Prologue:
I never expected to find someone who gets me. I wonder if he is my soulmate. I need the answer for this question. I hope so because I never felt this way about anyone. Crazy I would find him here in school. But Im glad I did as I been looking for him a long time.
"Babe." His voice brings me back to the present. I smile and say "Yea?" he smiles. Its genuine I could tell. "I Love you." he cups my cheeks and lightly kiss my lips for a moment. Warmth fills me to the core. I don't want to lose this.
I been empty for so long and just three little words pouring out of his mouth makes me so happy. But thats not what he saids at all. I imagined everything. It was to late when I realized I was in love with the idea of love and the guy I loved didn't love me.
Three years later....................
Three years has passed and I managed to contain my pain to a minimal. I sound like a robot ready to reboot and delete any feelings that may distract me. I should have know true love was Bullsh***t. Its my fault in believing the movies I watch could happen to me.
But as it turns out I am alone. Im sort of okay with that. Sort of? I really need to deal with it despite how I feel. Yet Im numb. I prefer to stay that way. My heart aches at the thought. Life goes on. He left. And I can't stop thinking about him. Why? I don't have the answers. I just sit here and wonder if he is thinking about me as much as I do about him.
It gets worse while I torment myself and cyberstalk him. Everytime a picture comes up of him, he looks as if he having the time of his life. Maybe happy. I wonder if he has any care in the world. He doesn't as he left me with no explanation. I figured he got what he wanted from me. My virginity. My virginity. Something so precious I can never get back. My body feels tainted. I feel stupid. I disregarded my mother wishes for me to wait until marriage. I ignore what my friends were saying. Worst of all I put him above everything else in my life.
But thats how it ended. I couldn't take the slickness out of his mouth. He was cocky to a point that he believed he was Gods gift to this earth. I stopped giving him compliments. His head was getting too big. Airhead size. I couldn't stand his selfishness either. He never once asked me if I was okay or how my day went. I hated the "WYD" throughout the text. It seemed we had nothing in common except lust. I was so naive to think there was something more. I should have known better. He put me in a position where I have no choice but to remain loyal to a person who is not mine.
