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Politics and Activism

The Key To Seeking Happiness From Within

How I learned to love myself and my life.

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The Key To Seeking Happiness From Within
Rosann Davison Nutrition

Emotions seem to be entirely unnecessary. Sadness. Anger. Frustration. Pain. Giddiness. Happiness. Surprise. Longing. Yearning. Each of these emotions has the power to make our day or ruin our lives. They lead us around and carry us on a never ending roller coaster ride.

And what really comes of the dizzying highs and the death-defying lows? If you really think about it what do emotions accomplish? On a practical level, I suppose that loving your children makes it easier to care for them when they're crying hysterically and refuse to sleep through the night. On the other hand, however, if we didn't have emotions would mothers still experience postpartum depression and feel the sadness and emptiness that moves some of them to extremes? I'm not a scientist and I'm not claiming to know the answer.

Movies make love, laughter and relationships seem like paradise: like a butterfly you're longing to grasp that keeps slipping from your fingers. The reality is that most relationships end and some relationships never begin.

The loss of self-esteem, confidence, sleep, ability to smile and the ability to pretend to be happy (while at work or in class or the rare occasion when you force yourself to go out with friends) isn't worth it. If I could abolish all emotions and think from a clear, rational, logical place all the time I would, in a heartbeat.

I find this thought to be discomforting mainly because I've always been an ardent believer in following your heart and listening to what your heart tells you. I don't want to have to stop listening to my heart. I don't want to constantly suffer at the hands of my unruly emotions. I don't want to only use my head to make decisions that rightfully belong to my gut or my heart.

I've spent the past 27 years listening to my heart. I threw myself into everything I did wholeheartedly and did everything I could possibly think of to be supportive, loving, caring, sympathetic, empathetic, compassionate, and there. I failed at times. When I failed it was because there was an entity devoid of emotion, caring and empathy on the other side of the equation. On the other end of the equation there was often an entity incapable of emotion.

There are people in this world incapable of love and emotions.

You might think that's harsh of me to say. The truth is that these entities make no attempt to hide the fact that they are adverse to all emotions.

They are self-described loveless entities. These entities are entirely self-sustaining and and while I wouldn't necessarily describe any of these entities as being happy- I would say that there is no sense they are missing out on anything.

If you think about it, you'll realize that you are most likely acquainted with or aware of a similar entity. If these entities can go through their existences without ever missing the emotions they lack then why can't the rest of us?

The answer seems obvious: we can go through our existences without emotion. The question then becomes why would one choose to live that way? Aren't the highs we experience with love, surprises, happiness, joy and laughter (e.g. weddings, births of children, grandchildren, honeymoons, first kisses and first dates) worth all of the lows (e.g. death, illness, rejection, loneliness etc.)? I'm not convinced that the answer to this question is "yes."

Hope. It gets better. Love. Keep Calm, Carry On. The media, society, culture—they inundate us with messages of longevity and to keep trekking through life hoping to achieve esteem and self-actualization (re: Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs). Hollywood presents us with new happy endings to strive for every Friday when the new releases hit theaters. Social Media (re: Facebook, Twitter, Instagram) allows us to show people we're living the lives we want to live as opposed to the lives we actually live. We show the best of ourselves as opposed to the mundane, ordinary existences most of us face on a day to day basis. What do we do it for? So we can feel good about ourselves.

This post devolved long ago into a rant that zigzagged across multiple topics and thoughts. The overarching bridge, connector, and point of it all is that we all hurt and we all long for the highs and the ideals that the media and society hurl at us. Maybe it's time to stop striving. Maybe it's time to be who we are, and to be content with that person.

We can't force others to like, love, or be with us. We can't force others to embrace the idea of going after the highs even if we have to suffer through the lows. Acceptance of each other and tolerance of those we care about- even when they infuriate us, even when they break our hearts, even when they can't give us one iota of effort or one moment of honesty—is our moral imperative.

Mother Teresa said it best: "I have found the paradox. If you love until it hurts there can be no more hurt." Love. Love until it hurts and love through the hurt. I can't promise that it will bring you exactly what you want, but I certainly can promise you will ultimately come out on the other side a better person for it. For if you give up on feeling you've not only given up on yourself, you've given up on humanity. Both your own and everyone else's

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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