My Love Language Is Physical Touch And Sometimes I Just Need A Hug To Keep Me Going

My Love Language Is Physical Touch And Sometimes I Just Need A Hug To Keep Me Going

"We need 4 hugs a day for survival. We need 8 hugs a day for maintenance. We need 12 hugs a day for growth." - Psychotherapist Virginia Satir

Photo by NeONBRAND on Unsplash

I'm the type of person that would never pass up a hug; I absolutely love them. I'm not talking about those wimpy hugs though, no, the hugs I'm talking about are a full-on embrace that lasts at least a few seconds, if not longer. I also adore bear hugs - being able to squeeze someone tight and feel them squeeze back is a feeling that can't be compared to anything else. On the other hand, I spite the awkward type of hugs that you don't fully embrace, and just feel the other person's touch to have them pull away the next second. Furthermore a side-hug is alright, but honestly, nothing beats the real deal.

Back at home, my Mom was always willing to give me a hug, whenever I needed it; my Dad and my sister less so. But being at college has definitely been a struggle in this sense cause I never know how long I'll have to go until I get my next hug. I go to college about an 8-hour drive from where my parents and sister live, so since coming to college those options for a hug have been ruled out and my bother - my only other sibling is about a 20-hour drive in the opposite direction. I've made sure to find some people around me that like hugs as much as I do and are always willing to give me a hug whenever I see them. However, there are some days I never see those people and those days are always the hardest to get through. Some nights when it gets really hard I just have to resort to squeezing a pillow, to at least feel like I'm hugging someone even if I don't get one in return. Additionally, I don't have a girlfriend, which isn't a bad thing as I definitely want to wait for the right girl. But I can't tell you how hard it is sometimes to see couples around my campus simply giving each other a hug, and knowing that I don't have that person I can rely on for a hug at any time.

To those people that love language isn't physical touch and moreover, those that aren't in college, it may sound like I'm being ridiculous. But others that are in my position would know where I'm coming from. As a guy, I'd it's a pretty safe bet to assume that another guy is fine with a hug, of course, it's always nice to ask. With hugging girls though, it can be a bit more difficult and you have to make sure that she is willing before going up and hugging her. Of course in most situations, it's more acceptable if you are friends with the other person. Still, it's always polite to ask, especially if it's a girl.

And it might sound selfish, but once I find those people though that are comfortable with giving me a hug I try to see them as often as I can with the hope that I can get a hug from them. Physical touch, and more specifically hugs are how I know that those people I love and surround myself with love me too. I know I shouldn't define others love for me by whether they give me a hug or not as they might be expressing it in another way. Depending on the person's love language, they may try to use how they feel loved as a way to show love. I definitely resonate with that because I feel I'm not able to fully show someone how much I care about them without being able to give them a hug. I suppose we just need to communicate with others what our love language is, and show others love in the way they most feel loved to let them know that we care about them. For me: if you want to show me that you care about me, nothing shouts louder than a silent embrace.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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