Dear Mimi,

The day you left us, I was only a toddler.

You passed away two days before my sister's birthday and we held the funeral on her birthday. After the funeral, we held a small party for my sister where we had cake and ice cream. We celebrated both your passing and my sister's birthday. We laughed. We cried. We hugged. We kissed. And when it was all over, we said goodbye and went on with our lives.

Of course, as a toddler, I was more engrossed with cake and ice-cream than anything else in the world. I did not realize it at first but it was not until my later years in life when I discovered how much you meant to this family. To my family.

I first started asking about you when I was around five years old. I asked my dad what happened to you and he told me that you had passed away a few years prior. He said that you were in Heaven and watching over all of us. He started to cry and was forced to stop talking about you. So, afterward, I went to my mom and asked her the same question. She gave me the same answer as my dad but she explained it in a way that she hoped I would understand.

She said that when people are old and their body is tired, they pass on. They go to live up in Heaven with God but still live on in our hearts and our memories.

I did not comprehend the word "death" at first. After all, I was only five. What was I suppose to know at that age?

My mom wrapped me tightly in her arms and said that I would understand one day. It would not be tomorrow or next week, but soon. Perhaps when I was older I would understand it all.

Then, when I asked about my dad, she told me that talking about you was still very hard for him. The wound of your loss was still fresh, even after a few years. He missed you very much and thought about you often. He wished that you were still here to watch my sister and I grow up and be with us.

My mom kissed my head and sent me off to bed.

As the years went by and I got older, I still wanted to know more about you. I wanted to know what your favorite color was. What your favorite time of the year was. What you liked to do. Did you like ice-cream as much as I did? Were you a cat or a dog person?

But the most important question I wanted to be answered was this: did you miss us? Did you miss me?

When I was almost done with my first semester of my junior year of high school, Papaw passed away. It was December. My finals were just around the corner and my world had completely changed after one phone call.

It was the morning when one of my uncles called my dad and told him the news. He was about to go to work. My mom was finishing up the dishes. I was about to go to school and prepare for finals. When the phone rang, the whole house was silent. No one said a word. I saw the hurt in my dad's eyes as he took in the news of Papaw's passing. When he finally hung up the phone, he told my mom and me what had happened and started crying.

Both of his parents were gone. First you, Mimi, and then Papaw.

I gave my dad the biggest hug I could muster but still I said nothing. What was I suppose to say? That I was sorry that Papaw was gone? That there was nothing my dad could have done? That Papaw was in a better place and was with you? I finally let go of my dad and my mom told me that I should get into the car for school. I did as I was told, grabbed my bag and went outside to the car.

School was even harder than I had imagined that day. I had to sit in class with the constant feeling in my gut that my dad was heartbroken. I still wonder to this day how he managed when I could barely speak. Maybe it was because I was always the one who wore her heart on her sleeve. Or because I loved with everything I had and expected nothing in return.

Whatever it was, it has made me so much stronger.

I continue to wear my heart on my sleeve because it is something that I am good at. I am good at sympathizing with people. I am good at listening. I am good at giving advice. I am good at just being me.

I guess after all these years, I see why my dad says that I am like you, Mimi. I'm stubborn. I'm kind. I'm brave. I'm loved by everyone I meet. You did those same things. You affected so many people in so many ways that I can only wish I can do the same.

Sometimes I wish that I had the chance to meet you so you could have watched me grow up. Graduate high school. Graduate college. Get married. But, I do know that you will be there for all of those things and more. You watched me graduate high school. You watched me start college. You watched me adopt my cat from the humane society and bring her home for the first time.

You will get to watch me graduate college with a degree in Criminal Justice. You will get to see me date so many people and get my heart broken by them too. You will see me find that special person like you did with Papaw and get married. You will see me do so many great things because I know you will.

I want to thank you more than anything for helping me become the person that I am today and help me continue to grow. I'm not done learning from you or Papaw. I have a lot to learn. So, thank you, Mimi, for all you have done in this world not just for me but for everyone who has ever come into contact with you. You have changed so many lives and I hope that one day, I will be able to do the same as you have.

I miss you and I love you.

Love always,

Your granddaughter.