An Open Letter To The Home Wreckers

An Open Letter To The Home Wreckers

Do us all a favor and leave the guys with girlfriends alone.

Most girls have experienced this at some point in their lives. You get a boyfriend, and you're so happy together, and then the home wrecker comes into the picture. The home wrecker can be an ex-girlfriend, a girl you don't even know, or even a "snake in the grass," such as a friend or family member. They start with something simple such as a text, message on Facebook or Instagram, likes on photos, or Snapchats. Then they weasel their way into the relationship as much as possible. They will try to cause problems, and even break up the relationship, usually for their personal revenge or benefit.

So, home wreckers, this is for you. First off, you are ruining your reputation. Girls talk, and I can promise you that if you break up one relationship, every girl will find out and run from you like you have the plague. No one wants that untrustworthy drama in their lives, except maybe you.

Secondly, karma is a b****. You go around messaging guys with girlfriends, thinking nothing of how it will ruin their relationship and never considering that the same thing could happen to you one day. That would really suck if you finally grow up and get a boyfriend and then you meet, you. Lastly, what you're doing is very disrespectful, mainly to the girlfriend. You cause trust issues, arguments, all which is unnecessary. I don't care if you're asking for some old clothes back, casually sending them a Snapchat that you posted on your story, or whatever your excuse is, it's wrong. You are disrespecting a girl you probably don't even know and messing with a guy that she cares about greatly. You may think that messaging your ex or your "best friend" is justified, but if he has a girlfriend, it is just off limits. Put yourself in their shoes: would you want some random girl, especially an ex, messaging your boyfriend? No, probably not. So just don't do it.

Thankfully, some of us have boyfriends who don't let these home wreckers ruin our relationships. However, the disrespect is still there, even if the relationship is strong enough to withstand your drama.

So home wreckers, save yourself the wrath of a crazy girlfriend, and the ruination of your reputation with all girls, and just leave the guys with girlfriends alone.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To The Broken-Hearted, Take A Moment And Breathe

There’s always sunshine after rain.

To the broken-hearted,

They say a heartbreak can make you stronger, so why does it make you feel so weak?

You meet someone new and he makes you weak in the knees. You can’t help but laugh around him, and let loose. You become best friends then all of a sudden you’ve fallen in love with his smile, and the look he gives you. Everything is going great, meeting the families, enjoying holidays, and meeting friends. Then the storm comes and all you are doing is arguing over the tiny things, except this time someone ends it. The tears won’t stop flowing from your eyes and the song you love so much makes you mad.

Take a moment and breathe.

One day it won’t matter. I know it hurts now but in 20 years it won’t. You have to grow as a person from this heartbreak. Take this time to figure out who you want to be in 20 years.

The thing about being a millennial is at the age of 18-25 all you’re thinking about is finding the right person to call your husband/wife, to live in the big farmhouse, with your three dogs, and two kids. But the main focus should be on YOU. If you’ve found that love, I am beyond happy for you, but for someone who is going through this now, I understand. All I wanted was to live with my boyfriend and make it, but we both had some growing to do. Not physically but emotionally and mentally. You cannot be with someone if you are not with yourself first. You cannot give away love if you do not have that type of love invested in yourself.

It’s hard to move on, so don’t move from guy to guy or girl to girl. Take pride in yourself. Prosper at your job or in school. Dress up and go out with friends, or just dress up and go to Walmart. Stop looking for love in places unless it’s in you. You’re still young and have a lot to live for.

I’m not saying don’t look for love, because you should... but look for love in the little things. Go on a hike, join a gym, go to a park, or take a trip to the beach. Get up and do something instead of feeling sorry for yourself because, trust me, it does not matter how old you are or where you are, the one for you will be there. Give it time. But for now, get out of that dark place and find the light. There’s always sunshine after rain.

Sincerely,

A Recovering Broken Heart.

Ps. A lot of this is advice from my mom... she’s pretty good at this.

Cover Image Credit: Jayden Trotter

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For The Girl Who Misses Him So Much It Hurts

Your heart was beating long before he came around, and it will continue to beat after.

You loved him.

You loved him when he made you laugh so hard tears sprang into your eyes. You loved him when he rendered you breathless by how easy it was to be yourself around him. You loved him when you woke up one morning and felt your heart beat in your chest. You loved him when he made you feel alive for the first time in what felt like forever.

You loved him when you locked gazes across the room, you loved him as the sky bled roses and golds behind you as you felt the warmth of his skin, you loved him until you couldn’t remember what came before him.

You loved him when you saw both childhood and a future reflected in his eyes. You loved him when he showed you the version of himself he kept hidden from the rest of the world. You loved him when you were in his arms and knew that you never wished to be anywhere else.

You loved him as he left.

And you have missed him since.

You miss him when you stand in a room full of people and feel emptier than you’ve ever been. You miss him when you laugh with your friends and wonder how you are not alone, you are not alone, but, my god, you are lonely. You miss him when you search for his face in the crowd, when you wonder if you will ever stop searching, when you don’t know if you want to stop. You miss him when you fear that you will never feel as full as you did when you were with him. You miss him when it hits you that losing him meant losing the person you were when you were with him.

For the girl who misses him so much it hurts:

This is for you.

I’m here with you. I know the ache in your bones. I know the vision in your head in which see him one last time, and maybe it’s a long embrace or a last kiss or maybe it’s the two of you in an unlit room, and you can see him better than ever before, and you shout at him—let me go, tell me this is over, destroy me so I cannot destroy myself. I know. Which is why I need to tell you that this loss and the paralyzing, all-consuming, seemingly infinite grief that comes with it—it isn’t weakness.

It isn’t weakness to miss him so much you feel like you cannot breathe. It isn’t weakness to lie in bed for days because the world is gray and terrifying and you’re not sure if you can face it without him. It isn’t weakness to find yourself where you were five years ago, having fallen for a glimmering smile and a self-made illusion, even though you swore to yourself then that you would never let anyone have the power to ruin you.

It isn’t weakness that you keep looking for his face everywhere you go, it isn’t weakness that you hold onto hope. It isn’t weakness to be the one who always falls first. To be the only one who falls. To be the only one who crashes when she hits the ground and left in pieces. It isn’t weakness. It isn’t weakness to love someone who doesn’t love you back.

For the girl who misses him so much it hurts:

I know it doesn’t feel like it, but your heart was beating long before he came around, and it will continue to beat after.

There is a part of you that stood in museums as a child and stared at paintings in awe, and was moved by music, and poetry, and cried when you saw your favorite movies for the first time. There is a part of you that sang along to the radio in the car with your friends after school. There is a part of you that sat in your living room with your family on a Sunday morning and laughed and felt innocence restored. There is still a part of you that was never touched by him, a part that cannot be taken away.

But for now you just have to go through the motions. Even though it takes everything in you to drag yourself out of bed and go to class and live. Even though it feels like betrayal in the most twisted way. Because every time you do it, it’ll get easier. And one of these days, it’s going to stop hurting. And the excitement that overwhelms you as soon as you wake up, the feeling of your heart being unable to contain itself, all the wonderful things that come with the sheer intoxication of infatuation will happen again. And it will be better. And it will be right.

For the girl who misses him so much it hurts:

You are going to be okay.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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