Dear ex-friend,
What is arguably most important about our situation is the fact that I had been down this road before. You are not the first friend that I have had that has turned against me, and in both times I have failed to learn the true reason why. But here is the most important difference between the first friend and you: they got over it.
What I did to make you not want to be my friend escapes me. If you had actually had the heart to be honest with me, maybe we could have talked it out and fixed it. Or maybe we could have talked it out and we would still be friendly with each other. But completely shutting me out and ripping me apart to our mutual friends and people I do not even know behind my back is what you thought was best for us. And, at that point, my name should not have had a reason to come out of your mouth.
I actually considered you a real friend, at least in the beginning. We did everything together and we saw each other every day. You were my go-to person to hang out with. Then, something changed. I have tried to get you to tell me what exactly that was but, for some reason, you will not give me a straight answer. Unfortunately, I know that that is just the kind of person you are but still, I would never have dismissed your concerns or feelings. I just wanted you to be honest with me.
Because we were so close, we made a lot of mutual friends. I am still really good friends with those mutual friends, and this is what about you confuses me the most. You still rip my name apart to them. Here is the simple fact: you know nothing about my life after you decided to stop being friends with me, so I do not know why you continue to rake my name and my reputation through the mud. At one point, you even turned some of my closest friends against me. You know what changed that? Dispelling everything you had told them. Because what you told them was not true. And never once did I ever tell them anything negative about you, except for the fact that you blatantly lied to my face and to theirs. And that was only because it was fact.
I do not hate you. I just wish you could make friends and embrace their triumphs and comfort them in their failures. You may have this internalized need to feel superior to everyone, but that is not what friends are there for. They are not there to feed your ego and as soon as I was not that person for you, you discarded me like trash. You were never there for my highs and you took advantage of my lows. Even after all I had done for you, at least I saw clearly where I had stood with you.
Here is what I want you to know. I am doing fantastic. I am exactly where I want to be accomplishing everything that I have set out to do. I hope you are doing fantastic, as well. I never once have wished ill on you and I never will, because I am not that kind of person. I think about you from time to time and wish I could still be your friend because, yeah, we shared a lot of good memories together. But then I think about the utterly amazing group of friends that I have now, the ones that I can go days (or even weeks) without talking to and we can pick up right where we left off, the ones that have stuck with me through my darkest and brightest days and vice versa, the ones that are honest with me, and I with them, no matter what, I realize that I do not need someone like you in my life. Maybe, one day, you will learn. I continuously wish you all the best.
Sincerely,
Your ex-friend
