Dear God,

I always had faith in you but it wasn't until I had given up, where I found your presence to be more evident and life saving.

I used to pray incorrectly. I used to pray to be dead rather than pray for another day alive. I used to pray to not wake up instead of praying to continue this beautiful life I was given. I took advantage of the life I was blessed to have. I'm not going to sit here and lie and say I've recovered because I haven't. I just found other ways to cope with the moments where I'm unsettled and aching.

I'm unsure if my perkiness about life is because I've grown up, seen other people suffer more, or because I've almost completely stopped suffering myself, but it's helped me make the days of others. I now have this excitement about life that I never thought was possible. When I hit rock bottom it seemed as if I'd never see the sunshine again, I'd never get past rainy days, and I'd never become a dream chaser.

Thank you for holding me up while I unwillingly dragged my body to get from one place to another.

As I began to pray correctly for my family and friends, for their health and happiness, I realized that my heart was too big to stop beating. I'm not sure if you found me before I found myself, but I'm thankful. I'm thankful for all those times where I prayed for death but got life, where I prayed for failure and got success.

I am intrigued in the lifestyles of those who suffer. I now strive to help others in hope that they'll rein the champion in their battles with life and have faith in your plan just like I did. My struggles and disbelief pivoted into a chance to help, to give advice, and to relate.

I gave myself a new chance at life when one morning I opened my eyes and pushed defeat to the curb and accepted the help and nourishment being offered.

I believe in your power and your healing abilities, thank you for believing in me too.

Love,

Yours Truly