Dear freshmen (and others) who know they have not found their home,

I know your friends and family are probably telling you that you just got to college, that it’s okay to feel homesick or discontented and that you should just stick it out. However, I know this feeling, and I know that it is not one that goes away. I believe that when you know, you know. Whether the school is too big, too far, too artsy, too small, too urban, etc., it is okay to admit how you really feel about it.

First off, you are not letting anyone down by admitting that you are just not where you belong. I know there is a certain parental pressure and it seems like all your friends are happy in their new homes, but they will all be there for you no matter what you are feeling.

Secondly, you are not alone. I remember that when winter break rolled around and I got together with all my high school friends, there were so many others in my position that I didn’t even realize. Out of my best friends, three of us transferred our second semester. Out of your high school classmates, I guarantee there will be a good number of transfers. People tend to move around a lot more than they did before, and it’s definitely for the best.

I truly believe that when you know, you know. I only toured three college campuses when choosing my first school, and when I got denied to my top, I defaulted to my second. I never bothered exploring what was out there, and by the end of the first month, I knew that it was not the place for me. It wasn’t anything against the place––it was just not right.

Finally, once you admit this to yourself and are able to move on, you won’t regret it. Transferring to a place that I felt fit me better was the best decision I could have made. You will see what you have been missing out on, and you will have what you’ve heard all about from your friends. Finding your home is the best feeling ever, and the people I’ve met at the U of M are truly amazing. I’ve had some of the best times at my new home, and even though I there are things I would change (the snow), I wouldn’t dream of leaving.

It’s a big step, but it is one that is completely necessary and rewarding once you take it. It’s okay to take a step back and admit the school you’re at is not for you. Then, you have to do something about it. Start researching, talking to people and find your home.