Water, food, and shelter are the necessities of life. What about love? Do we need love in order to survive? Of course, we all deserve, and want love. But, how much of that need of love is our own? Beginning in our childhood we are exposed to this idea that we need to find a life partner; once we find our life partner we marry them and start a family. If we don't then our life will be “unfulfilling” and “dull”. Everything's about love. We see this concept in songs, books, and movies. Especially in Disney films: the princess waiting for her true love to come sweep her away. Typical romance movies: some person’s life is sad and dull, but finding a love fixes all of their problems. Such false advertisement. Yes, they are only fictional situations, but they become deeply embedded in our minds at a young age. We have normalized this concept, made it part of our life goals. There is nothing wrong with striving to find a life partner, do what makes you happy just make sure you're doing it for the right reasons. The pressure we feel to find our "soulmate" is enormous; especially with the introduction of social media. It's a constant intake of relationship goals, and advice on how to find the love of your life. A constant flood of posts about being lonely, or complaints that they are not in a relationship.

I understand, I’ve been there. I find myself at many points wishing I had a romantic relationship with someone. I'm eighteen years old, I've had only one boyfriend and that didn't last very long. Nor was it an ideal relationship. I make myself feel bad when I see people all around me in what seems like happy relationships. I understand how it feels, we all do. But why is it we push it upon ourselves, the idea that we need to have a romantic relationship in our life or else we are inadequate. It's okay to not have this type of relationship with someone at this moment, or at any point if you don't want to. You have to reevaluate and ask yourself what you really want. Not everyone needs to have someone, not everyone needs to share this same lifestyle. We have idealized and normalized this idea of a “perfect life”: find a soulmate, get married, and have kids. The youth obsesses over this idea of trying to find a soulmate for life, someone that is perfect for them. Well, relationships are not perfect, they aren’t going to be smooth sailing from start to finish. Relationships are painful, difficult, Of course, we want someone to love us in a way that is different from the love of our family and friends, but it is okay to not have someone. Sometimes you have to stop and appreciate the love from your family and yourself. People destroy themselves over the fact that they don't have a partner in their life. You're not alone and you're not inadequate. It's okay to take your time and focus on yourself. Having someone in your life depends on each individual because it might not always be best. The pressure from society and family can be easy to succumb too, but it is important to do what makes you happy.

There are no instructions written in stone, giving us the guidelines of how we create a “perfect life”. There is nothing perfect about this life. And until we realize that, we will continue to berate ourselves for things we have not done or do not have. This idea that we need a partner for life doesn’t have to be followed by everyone, nor does it mean you have to have found your “soulmate” at this point in your life. Finding someone that fits you well takes time, so don’t feel sad, or bad for not being in a relationship. Easier said than done, but try enjoying being with yourself. Learn to be happy with the love you have for you. Don’t rely on someone else to find your happiness.