When I was younger, the most popular punishment at school was time-out. Time-out was not something I really wanted to be punished with, but I also didn't detest it. As an introvert, the idea of time alone to myself was not something I minded. In fact, on days where my friends were being particularly tiring, some time alone would have been welcomed. Thinking on it now, why was time-out even seen as a punishment? Sure, I didn't get to run around and play with my friends, but as I stated before, I'm an introvert, that's hardly much of a punishment to me.
So, why have our schools seen it as a punishment for children?
We can begin by noticing that our culture has grown into an extrovert-driven society, especially with the rise of social media. We are expected to participate in group work at schools and interact on social media with all of our friends, whether on group chats or other mediums. More and more people are looking for teamwork and presentation skills for colleges and careers.
In other words, our culture has become an introvert's nightmare, which is crazy, since studies have shown that every 1 in 3 or 1 in 2 people in the U.S. are an introvert.
It's not that we can't communicate well or be a team player, but when we are called to do it 24/7, we need time to help us re-charge--which brings us back to time-out.
Kids are assigned tons of group activities for school and then are expected to play with others during their free time and are supposed to interact at lunch--where we sit, forcing all the kids at giant tables so that it's impossible to be alone. Knowing this, it's no wonder our children who are introverts get so burned out and frustrated.
I remember little elementary-school me sitting on the ground near grass and gravel with the sound of the teachers talking and all the other kids playing. I would sit and make little things with the grass and gravel to keep me occupied, or I'd just sit and think--of stories or life in general. I could reflect without interruption. I'd enjoy being allowed to go play with my friends once I finished doing my time, but I never really hated time-out.
I'm not calling for reform on punishment, but I think it's important for us to remember that our society is so extrovert-driven and discipline is not one-size-fits-all. If you're an extrovert, that is by no means a bad thing, but I ask that you think of the introverts out there whenever you try to make plans. And if you're an introvert? Make sure you allow time for yourself, your extrovert and introvert friends will thank you for it, and you'll thank yourself, too. Don't let society and culture burn you out.
If you want to know more about introversion and extroversion related to our culture today, I highly recommend you read Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susan Cain, which is where I got the statistic from.
