I Am Thankful For The Friends I Lost

I Am Thankful For The Friends I Lost

They helped shape me into the person I am today.
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Many times I hear people say hateful things towards their ex-friends and talk bad about them and say how they wish they never met them. When you have a friend break up, it is natural to feel hurt and angry and upset. Believe me, I know.

I was the same way when it came to those emotions. I gave in on multiple occasions to gossiping or taking my anger out by saying something mean. The one thing I never said was that I wish I had never met them.

I believe that God puts people in your life for a reason.

Everyone you meet and let into your life impacts you in some way or another. They help shape you into who you are in some way. Everyone in my life has definitely impacted me; no matter how big or small.

After the friend breakups I had, I was extremely hurt and sad and alone. I had lost people that I told everything to and it really happened all at once. Junior and senior year of high school I lost some of the most important friends I had had in high school.

I remember just thinking how could I have gone from coming into high school with a million and one friends to losing some of the most important people to me. I didn't lose everyone, and I am so grateful for the friends I do still have from high school (I am so excited to see you all on break!), but I did lose some really close friends.

I didn't realize the effect these girls had in my life until I came to college.

All of the friends I have had have helped me realize what I want in myself and my relationships. They have helped me learn what I want in a friend. I have learned what kind of people I want to surround myself with and the people I don't want to surround myself with.

They have also taught me so much about myself. I realized things that weren't so good about myself. I learned to not act in anger and look at all sides of a situation before coming to conclusions. I learned how to be a better friend and really be a positive influence on someone.

Coming to college, all these lessons helped me build a strong foundation and know what I want. Because of everything I learned from these people I was able to know what people I wanted to surround myself with and not get caught up in the wrong crowds.

So, I just want to say how thankful I am to everyone I knew in high school. I was challenged in so many ways and really grew as a person because of all of you. Thank you for showing me things about myself that I didn't know I needed to know.

I am glad you were all a part of my life. I wouldn't change any of it. I had some of my best times with you and I hope you all are living it up in college. I hope you all have found your people and are having an amazing time.

Thank you for the lessons that you have taught me. I am grateful for everything you have given me. I would not be the person I am today without you all.

Cover Image Credit: Pexels

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To That One Friend Who Deserves The World

Since I can't give you the world, I hope giving you this article is enough.
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My wonderful friend,

You deserve love.

You deserve to marry your best friend.

You deserve appreciation.

You deserve that no matter who comes in and out of your life, every selfless thing you do for someone is acknowledged.

Have Your Voice Heard: Become an Odyssey Creator

You deserve kindness.

You deserve to have the nicest people in the world surround you all of the time.

You deserve support.

You deserve to have someone there for you at the beginning of every good day and at the end of every bad one, to have someone who wants to fix all of your problems.

You deserve hope.

You deserve to always be optimistic.

You deserve laughter.

You deserve to never stop smiling and actually mean it every time you do.

You deserve forgiveness.

You deserve to be able to be given second chances because without a doubt you are worth it.

You deserve friendship.

You deserve to have a friend who can be just as good of a friend as you are.

You deserve honesty.

You deserve to always be told the truth.

You deserve motivation.

You deserve to never want to give up and always push yourself.

You deserve success.

You deserve to have everything you have worked so hard for.

You deserve faith.

You deserve to always know it will get better.

You deserve loyalty.

You deserve to have that one person who will never leave and always be there for you.

You deserve happiness.

You deserve to be genuinely content with your life.

You deserve the world.

If I could give it to you, I would.

Yes, life gets tough sometimes. The unthinkable happens and your world feels like it is crashing down but you can get past all of this.

Thank you for being so selfless. It amazes me how you do it sometimes, but thank you for always making everyone your main priority when they need you.

I know I may not say it enough, but truly thank you for all you do for me. I don’t always know how to show how much someone means to me, especially when it is someone as great as you because I don’t know what I did to deserve you, but thank you.

I love you.

Cover Image Credit: Liz Spence

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Shockingly, There Is Strength In Being Weak

Abandon the idea that you do not deserve to be taken care of. You do!

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The one challenge in having a brave face, is others never considering there are moments you may not be. It is a beautiful yet complicated gift to be able to provide comfort to others. To be the person your friends and family turns to in times of crisis. Just remember that those who offer help, may need help sometimes too.

Lately, I have been struggling. Having flares of anxiety and repetition of old behaviors, that I am not so proud of. I am so kind to others facing struggle, but I have yet to understand the importance of offering myself the same respect.

Some may suggest therapy, seeking out health professionals. For many that may work. And if that is a tool that works for you, power to you! If you feel comfortable with the process pursue it! For myself, I am not. And I will tell you why.

I have yet to swallow my pride. To understand that the strong fail too. Oh how I despise failing. And I think fear of failure comes from my own personal expectations, to hold it "together". Because if I fall, who will those closest to me lean on? I have strength, therefore if I fall, we all do.

That may sound like an idiotic sentence, and while forming the words I recognize how false a statement it is. However, this is a deep rooted issue for many individuals. And for me this is something I struggle with. Allowing for the world to see my weakness.

One of my best friends, who has recently opened my eyes said to me, " To have the courage to ask for help is not you showing weakness, but strength." It takes a great deal of strength to open up. I find myself suppressing my emotions. Meanwhile, I write weekly about confronting your past. Yet I struggle in the practice I preach.

That is not weakness, yet it is a glimpse of reality. I am thankful for my friend, who noticed a shift within me, to speak up and make sure that I recognize that I am falling. Sometimes you cannot only rely on yourself, and you need to admit that you need help.

My greatest joy is helping others but again I cannot find the generosity in my heart to offer it to myself. I was wrestling with the "why". Why I cannot allow for others to worry about me, why I simply do not want other people to worry about me. It is because that is my job. Then I realized, being a brave individual goes hand in hand with wanting control.

I struggle with allowing for myself to be a mess. To admit when I have lost control of who I am. The issue with a brave face? You rarely let others see you cave. So those around you assume you are stedfast, strong, in control, without a shadow of a doubt ; okay.

I understand not each individual is intuitive. That people miss the signs of when others emotional well beings are compromised. I am grateful for my best friend and her intuitive mind and heart. Recognizing that I have not been completely myself as of late, just an extension.

For those of you , who feel you lack the skill. Those who are not capable of reading between the lines, noticing lack of bravery, please I advise you to check up on the ones who you are usually so sure that are "okay". A simple, "how are you", goes a very long way.

I know I was hoping all day that someone would recognize I was not so myself and ask the question. Thankfully, my best friend did. It is nice to know someone sees you. To understand that you're human, and to remind you that you're human. The brave are allowed to fall.

I note that this also means, the brave need to allow for transparency. Because when you allow for others to see your struggle, it is easier for them to then offer a helping hand. Break your silence, even if it proves that you are not always brave.

Each individual has strengths and weaknesses. My weakness? Being weak. Allowing for myself to strip off the mask of " I am okay", and revealing the " I am not okay".

Again, to be brave is in fact a complicated gift. Being emotionally strong for others, does not mean you do not deserve to also be taken care of. To be offered the same respect of healing and love. Leave behind the idea that those managing others issues, means they can manage their own. Even the bravest of walls can come falling down.

It does not take long to ask a three worded question; " How are you?" I hope those are brave enough to answer honestly.

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