A family friend of mine, (whom I cannot mention as she wants to remain anonymous,) and I were having a conversation on Sunday about what happened in Orlando. “Am I safe?” she asked.
I looked at her and asked why she questioned that. I patted her on the back and hugged her. “I don’t know,” I said, “I don’t know.” For a 12-year-old to ask me if she is safe was more than frightening. I myself do not know if I am safe, and for me to confidently tell her that she is was not possible.
On Sunday, June 12, 2016, around 2 a.m. a shooting happened that killed 49 people and left 50+ injured. That morning I woke up around 3:05 a.m. out of nowhere, and started looking through my news feeds, to find: “Breaking News: Orlando Club Shooting.” I got scared as I was in my room all by myself and had nothing with me except my teddy bear. I quickly exited Facebook and started watching YouTube videos to get my mind off of what was happening that morning. Around 10 a.m. I woke up and received a text from a family friend asking me what happened in America. I thought my eyes had been lying to me when I saw the words “Breaking News: Orlando Club Shooting.” Sadly, they weren't. It was real, and once again we lost dozens of innocent human beings within a few years, months, weeks, days, minutes, seconds. The word sad does not even describe how I feel right now.
“Why do people kill people? What do they gain from killing innocent people? Whether it be in Syria, Gaza, Bangladesh, India, Norway, America, or wherever you are on the planet...why? I do not feel safe on this planet. I am scared. Should I be scared? Whenever I go to school I have to look around and observe the place and the people because you just do not know what will happen. Whenever you, me and/or others go to the movies, I see you (me) trying not to show fear on your face because you are watching and observing people. When I go to the mall I have to look around and feel like I have to strategize something to escape. When I see cops I do not know if they are real or fake ever since the attack in Norway in 2011. Am I going to be harmed because I am brown? Oh my god, will I be harmed because I am confused about my identity? I’m even scared to be at home, visiting the temple, everything, and anything. Am I safe? The world is coming to an end. Almost every month I hear some kind of shooting is happening. Why do people have so much hatred stored in their vena cova? Why don’t they just release it by getting help? Why do people hate women, men, or a specific group? What have they ever done to that one human being? Why? I want to go up to them and ask, why? Why!? Stop the war, stop killing innocent people, please stop. Please stop killing innocent children; they're so innocent and they are still blooming,” said this family friend of mine.
She turned towards me. “Am I safe? Are you safe? Are we all safe? Is the planet even safe anymore?”
Tears started rolling down our eyes. “We can’t be scared, we have to be strong. ‘And love is love is love is love is love is love is love is love.’ The medicine to all this is love,” I said, not knowing if what I said was right or wrong, hugging her tightly as tears rolled down my cheeks.
R.I.P. to all those that lost their lives in Orlando and around the world. You are not alone. Trust me.
And is humanity even important anymore?