Spanish is my first language. English is my second. French is my third, but I am still trying to figure that one out. Simple enough, right? Wrong.

I cannot say something in Spanish or French if you ask me randomly. What do you want me to say? Because it seems to me that all you care about is the foreignness or ‘exotic-ness’ of my ability to speak a language besides English. But really, what am I supposed to say? There is literally an entire vernacular of verbiage that I could produce for you, but just like taking an exam or giving a presentation in class, everything has magically slipped my mind from the pressure of just saying something.

Just because I can speak, read and write in three languages, does not indicate that I can translate two of them into English. Sometimes a phrase, paragraph or speech will only make sense to me in the language being spoken - be it Spanish or French. It's actually very hard for me to find the English equivalent. No, it's not amazing or weird that I am trilingual. Honestly, America is probably the only nation where the majority of students start learning a foreign language when they enter high school. Just look at the rest of the world. Basically a large part of the world population is bilingual since it helps with better communication and understanding other humans. Why is it such a foreign concept for someone to be bilingual, or in my case multilingual in America? Why does it seem like English should be the only language Americans should know how to speak? When this country does not even have an official national language.

As a first-generation American, I was never raised to think that I was better than everyone else, because I never grew up thinking I was different from them. I have come to realize however, that my perception often differs from reality. Our society often classifies multicultural Americans as second-class citizens, prompting many millennials to dissociate from their parents' cultural heritage and abandon their native tongue in order to conform to American ideals.

I realized I have an “accent” when I first left my bubble of Washington Heights, NYC. Growing up surrounded by Dominicans like myself, I never noticed it until an outsider pointed it out. At first it was weird, do not get me wrong. Sometimes I speak as if “I came right off the boat” according to my non-Dominican friends. But I also (sometimes) speak like a “Pura Americana” according to some Dominican friends and family. Being a Dominican-American who is also learning French is difficult. I have to prove to my Dominicans how Dominican I am. Yet have to prove to the Americans how American I am. Gotta be more Dominican than the Dominicans and more Americans than the Americans, all at the same time. Hope you got the Selena reference there. It’s exhausting, but not something I am ashamed of.

I may speak a little different than others, but that does not make me less of a person, nor does it give anyone the right to judge or make assumptions of my life.

Although I have not found a balance between all three languages, I hope I do not permanently lose that which has ultimately shaped who I am today.