Studied by Irwin Altman and Dalmas Taylor in 1973, Social Penetration Theory (SPT) explains how two people become more acquainted with each other, whether it be intimate or superficial. In the textbook Introducing Communication Theory: Analysis and Application, authors West and Turner described this process as some form of trajectory, a “pathway to closeness.” Altman and Taylor explain it as if you would peel an onion, layer by layer.
In every relationship, there is trust, honesty, and the in's and out's of expressing personal feelings. However, you do not talk to just anyone about these things or gain automatic trust. The assumptions of this theory state that every growing relationship has forms of depenetration. “Relationships do fall apart, or depenetrate, and this could lead to relationship dissolution.” Dissolution, or the ending of a relationship, can be because of many things: loss of trust, futures not being compatible, or even holding on to grudges. Relationships are about bonding with a complete stranger. After all, it does begin at meeting a stranger. Later on, that bonding becomes more intimate. This theory follows a scientific method approach.
For an example, I have been with my boyfriend for two years now. It did not start that way of course. We met as strangers in high school and gradually gained a friendship. We both graduated and he went off to boot camp to be a marine and I went to college. Two years later, we got back in touch and it was like we were back where we left off. We continued with the bonding and soon the friendship became closer. We shared stories with each other that we would not with anyone else, and soon that friendship turned to two years of loving each other.
This can easily describe the gradual change in closeness over time. West and Turner would describe the beginning of a relationship as something with self-disclosure. According to them, “Our self disclosure may be spontaneous.” Taking that leap of faith to talk to someone new is the first step, and then it gradually gets closer as the process.
