Call it an apology. How’s this for a dichotomy of culture:
Let’s call her Sarah. With her last social media post coming nearly four weeks prior, Sarah skipped Mass this week with more important matters to attend to: there was updating to be had. By the time her parents and younger brother return from Mass, Sarah’s new profile picture has 119 likes and 21 comments, each one lauding how majestically perfect Sarah looks in that blue dress. Sarah knows she’s beautiful.
Amelia is one of Sarah’s best friends. She was, however, not one of the 119 likes or 21 comments commending Sarah’s online social grace. Amelia was one of the attendants at the Mass which Sarah skipped. At fourteen years old, it still seems as though insecurity came with her job description. She caught only the last line of the First Reading from Proverbs: “Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.” Amelia couldn’t be more sure of the fact that whatever beauty is, she does not possess it.
Sarah is so sure she represents beauty. Amelia cannot lift her head to chase it. And a society that thinks it knows the answers is far more dangerous than made-up two girls who don’t.
Let’s establish first that today’s society boasts an incorrect definition of beauty. In fact, the contemporary definition of beauty is as erroneous as societal misconceptions regarding nearly everything else Christian. Never has there been a concept so frequently used, and so seldom truly understood. Social media is proof that we are as quick to call each other beautiful as we are slow to discover the actual weight behind its real meaning. It’s no wonder that with so much confusion surrounding the concept, the search for true beauty and its definition becomes that much harder.
The reason there’s such a large confusion surrounding the concept of beauty lies in the simple fact that so few people know the source of all beauty. Women of Christ are beautiful because they reflect the Savior, the source of all beauty. Beauty itself is found in mirroring the personality of a servant of Christ. And in a culture so quick to dismiss not only religion, but also anything and everything which doesn't yield immediate product, there isn’t a plethora of women yearning to mirror a selfness Savior.
Love for the sake of love doesn’t exist to most of society. As soon as the concept of love jumped from the cliff, beauty followed its lead. The world doesn’t wait for selflessness to yield its dividends, and not coincidently, true beauty requires selflessness.
Men today could not do a worse job in searching out true beauty. Pretend for a moment that in some weird twist of fate, every academic institution in the country taught its students that the ideal occupation in this world was that of a garbageman. With enough convincing, soon the majority of America’s best and brightest would be aspiring to haul neighborhood trash for a living.
We aren't too far from that reality. Many men are indeed chasing garbage. The difference is, at least the students in the metaphor understood that the were collecting trash. Today’s men chase something as fake as trash, but as shiny as treasure. The contemporary concept of beauty,
the one men strive for, is addictive. Physical beauty is important. But it withers before the importance of true beauty, that which suffers today as a result of a disposable culture.
The hope is here. Perhaps there has never been a concept so thoroughly mocked, yet so fully alive. There’s nothing wrong with commenting on someone’s outer beauty. But everything right about beauty stems from something so much more than we could ever deserve. Beauty is by definition sacrificial. It’s putting someone’s needs before your own, with the understanding that there may be no source of identifiable repayment. Beauty is frequented by pain, fraught with selflessness, and for all intents and purposes, laden with love. The world has slapped a large “unrealistic” tag on our concept of beauty. To anyone without Christ, true beauty is impossibly difficult to maintain, because it includes mirroring the type of selflessness which requires a courage far above the capacity of pure human strength.
We need women. This needs to be made all the more clear. I can only apologize for the way you are objectified. I can only apologize for the way that men force you to compete with the unrealistic ideal presented by the lies of pornography and the monster of superficial, typified unreality. But as your brother in Christ, understand we need sisters. Without you, the definition of beauty will change. In order for the authentic definition of beauty to stay true, there must be some women willing to uphold it. Genuine Christian men are the minority. And genuine beauty only attracts that minority. We can say with most certain conviction that Christian women are all more beautiful when the world wants to tell them quite the opposite.
Women who typify authentic Christian beauty are ignored and ridiculed. It doesn’t make sense. Then again, neither does a perfect Savior born into an imperfect world, where fated to die he fulfilled the cost of our nails with his hands. Women, this world will ever understand the perfect love. Find a guy who refuses to live by the standards which characterize his surroundings.
Our beauty was bought with nails, not Facebook likes. Christ set the standard. It’s up to you to keep it that way.
