Over the past year, I have changed. Over the past year, I have grown and made a real effort to become healthier and happier than ever before. I'm growing up, and currently I have been sad and looking at the glass half empty. I spent so much time and energy being sad and not knowing why. I had some reasons but everyone has reasons to be sad. I was sad when the sun was out. I spent so many lonely nights in my room wondering why this life mattered. I did not want to be here. I felt no reason to be here. Even now, I struggle with my mental health and need some extra help but the difference is now a days I want to be better, before I just didn’t care to be better. Sadness was comfortable and I understood it so I stayed stuck in a dark constant cycle of it.
But now, I truly want to be better so I can help others deal with the things I do. That I know is my purpose and to do that, I must be here. God is the reason I have changed for the better. I always kept my faith in Him no matter how low I got, no matter how badly I felt inside. I always believed in Him and He helped me dig myself out of the dark hole I created. I have now been focused on the positive, always trying to find one thing every day to be happy and thankful for. I take each moment and experience in and look at it as precious; because my time here is precious and I don’t want to take it for granted and waste it anymore.
I see the sun behind the clouds, the rainbow after the storm, and hope behind the sad now. I became determined and honestly want to be happy and thankful for this life. With all of my heart. Since I have been determined and truly set on this change, I have been happier, I can’t believe I am saying it but I am. If you asked me a couple years ago if I believed in real happiness, I would have said no without hesitation but now I believe. It takes a lot of effort and patience within yourself. You must train your mind to see positive more than negative, with the help of God, it is so possible. His hand is always there, you just have to grab it. Let go of all your pain and struggles, He will take it and return it with real and pure happiness.
You have to want the help and want the growth. It is not easy and it it’s a continual process, you just can’t give up on it. I am still working on changing my perspective, but I’m getting there. Life is a gift, as much as it feels like a curse, it is a gift from God, and there is a purpose. Keep fighting your demons, keep following your passions and keep hope in your soul. See the glass half full because it truly is a better perspective.
