None of us can see into the future. This is something we all know. However, do we really know it? Look and listen around you and you will notice all the planning and predicting. Being a 19-year-old in college, I am constantly getting the question, “So, what do you want to do when you’re older?” and, “So are you set on that?” And in all honestly, I don’t know. And I will not know for a while. And this is something that no one can accept - that you can plan for the future and try to predict the future, but in the end, no one really knows the future till they’re living it.

I have never been someone who knows exactly what they want to do. However, this year taught me that even the things you think you know, you don't.

This past year I attended my freshman year of college. My experience at this college made me go from being one of the happiest people to one of the unhappiest. Looking back, this was most likely due to a combination of choices I made, along with the school not being a good fit. But I can guarantee you that not enjoying my freshman year of college was not something I planned.

This past year I dated someone that made me so, so happy. Someone that lead me to believe the chance of getting married in the future was more realistic than breaking up. This did not serve me when I started becoming someone who was dependent and started making decisions based on them rather than myself. This is when I realized the harsh truth that maybe dating someone at this age, so serious, isn't what will lead me to my full potential.

After my decision to transfer to another school, to take a shot at it a second time around, I evaluated my true wants better, along with what will actually serve those wants; I realized that dating someone in college is not what is best, nor was attending the huge school that everyone seems to love. I learned that what is best for me is going to be different from what is best for everyone else.

And that not knowing the future is okay because it will always be unpredictable.

This being said, if you know for a fact you want to be a doctor when you grow up, I encourage you to pursue that and I am jealous of you; however, I don’t think anyone knows what they will actually be when they grow up until they are literally grown up. It's the steps you take to get there that mold you into your best self, whether or not you end up where you intended. For example, that girl that is studying abroad in Honduras for medical school may learn that she actually wants to do missionary work for a nonprofit - you just never know.

Not knowing the future is one of the scariest things for some of us - a lot of us - so we make plans and predictions as if we know they will come true. We need to accept the fact that we will learn along the way.

Keep living through the motions. Enjoy the moment. Do what you know to be best for you right now.

Because one day you will be all grown up and lean over to your kids ask them, “ So, what do you want to be when you grow up?” And this is when you will realize you’re asking the most famous question in the book - the one that is mostly answered fictionally, but ends up placing everyone right where they belong.

~everything will be okay