5 Things Every Aggie Should Have Put On Their Christmas List

1. A Collie

“Daddy PLEASE. Can we please get a dog for Christmas?”

“No. Absolutely not.”

“Well… What if we get a purebred Rough Collie?”

“I’ll call the breeder in the morning.”

2. Added lanes to Holleman, George Bush, and Wellborn

Please--For the love of all things good and holy, we need more sophisticated roadways in College Station. It’s as if the Texas A&M Board of Regents and The College Station City Council got together and said “Hey! Let’s build a billion-dollar football stadium, enroll thousands upon thousands of additional students, and do absolutely nothing with our streets.”

Wait a minute… That’s exactly what happened! People forget that College Station used to be a FARM TOWN. Our roads are not capable of handling the amount of people that are being pumped into this city every year. Oh, and by the way, considering most of these kids are college students, they all have cars and they all drive by themselves, creating the worst traffic known to man on a small-town level.

Bottom line—Just expand the roads. Please.

3. A Scholarship

Okay, the cat is officially out of the bag, and that cat is Jimbo Fisher. Jimbo, I would like to personally thank you for exposing the endless pot of gold that is Texas A&M’s bank account. Texas A&M has roughly 50,000 undergraduate students, and according to my calculations, Jimbo Fisher’s contract contains enough guaranteed money to give every undergraduate student a $1500 scholarship. Therefore, the next time that I walk into the Scholarships & Financial Aid Office, I refuse to take “We’ve used all the money we have” as an answer.

4. An Above-Par Football Team

Back to Jimbo Fisher. I hope you’re worth the money my man. With the facilities A&M has and the recruiting pool the state of Texas has to offer, we should be a national championship contender. Now—That’s what we should be. However, I just ask that we be above average, for now. I’m tired of 7-5 and

8-4. Let’s start by shooting for 9-3 or 10-2 next year then we’ll build from there. Let’s be honest, everyone is trying to become the next Alabama and there simply isn’t another Alabama. So, let’s try to simply be a better Texas A&M.

5. An Aggie Ring

Last but most certainly not least, the Aggie Ring. The greatest testament to becoming a member of the hallowed Aggie Family. Logistically, the Aggie Ring goes for about $1000 nowadays so the idea of getting one for Christmas doesn’t sound too bad. However, to obtain an Aggie Ring in general is on every true Aggie’s bucket list, and if you are an underclassman at A&M, it better be on your list next Christmas season.