It is easy to think of unconditional love as what you feel toward your parents, your siblings, your best friends and of course your dog. It is easy to put effort into those relationships because it comes naturally. It is also easy to forget that each and every one of us are called to love our neighbor as ourselves. And these "neighbors" that Jesus spoke of, they include your roommate who you don't really get along with, that one group of girls in your hall that you strongly dislike, that one professor who makes you feel like you could teach the class better in your sleep and yes, that guy who broke your heart and doesn't even seem to care. These are the people that we are called to love without condition. However, that is definitely easier said than done.
It starts with forgiveness. It is impossible to love someone while holding a grudge against them. Sometimes, we may not even realize that, deep down, whatever that person did still makes us burn with anger. My advice is to pause and think about how your resentment toward that person is benefiting you in any way. Is it helping you grow as a person? Is it furthering your relationship with God? Is it in any way bringing you more satisfaction or closure? Most likely, you answered no to all of those, which should tell you that it's time to let this go. There is a famous quote by Buddha that says, "Holding onto anger is like drinking poison and expecting the other person to die." It's unhealthy, it's harmful and it will take over your life if you let it.
So how do we love our neighbors? Obviously, Jesus wasn't talking about only loving the neighbors that are easy to love and then ignoring and silently judging everyone else. We are called to love everyone, including our enemies, unconditionally. To love your enemy is to pray relentlessly for their well-being. To love your enemy is to go out of your way to ask them how their day is going. To love your enemy is to sit with them at lunch when you see them sitting alone. To love your enemy is to be there for them when you see that they are struggling. To love your enemy is to get to a place where you can stop looking at them as your enemy and realize that he/she is a child of God who is as loved and cherished by the Father as you are.
“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.”
- Matthew 22:37-39
“Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.”
- Romans 12:10
