I know very well those type of people who don't want to get too close too soon. They hate the feeling of vulnerability, the feeling of having their emotions out in the open. I know this because I used to be like this. But sometimes hiding your emotions and being closed off hurts you more than it saves you.
Emotions are a part of us. It makes us who we are. If you keep rejecting them, they will only bottle up and then you will explode. It is important to say how you feel. Whether it's with a friend or with a significant other, you need to be able to air out how you feel. You shouldn't be afraid to cry or to love.
If you're in a relationship and you're all mysterious and secretive all the time, it gives your partner mixed signals. Mixed signals lead to confusion. That is unfair, especially when your partner gives you all of them and you cannot give all of you. In friendships, it is okay to break down in front of close friends. You do not always have to be the strong one who has it together. You can be open about what you're going through. And if they are truly your friends, they will be there with you and support you without any judgment.
Sometimes, when you feel uncomfortable about opening up, you will also feel uncomfortable in situations where others are talking about their personal feelings. You might feel awkward and out of place because you are not one to share your feelings with everybody. But understand that these situations are a stress reliever for some. It can be a stress reliever for you. Especially if you're surrounded by those you are close to.
I understand that sometimes you don't want others to pity you. You don't want them to think you're weak for crying or breaking under pressure. But the thing is, when you are able to accept your feelings and be connected with them, that does not make you weak; it makes you strong. A while back, I used to think that showing my emotions towards others or towards myself was weak, so instead, I'd keep them all to myself. But now, I admire those who are able to be so affectionate but also voice their emotions so well. Up to this day, I find it difficult to accept others' affection and also show mine.
The point is, if you are afraid to open up that huge bottle of feelings to others, there are other ways to let them out. You can write in a diary or talk to someone extremely close to you. I might sound like a broken record, but it is extremely unhealthy to bottle your emotions. It is important to talk and have someone who will listen to you without any judgment.
The process of opening up to others may be easy for some, but very hard for others. It all depends on how comfortable the person is with other people and also with their own feelings. Keep in mind that you do have people who care about you. They won't pity you or think you're weak. You don't always have to be the strong one with no emotions. Sometimes, it's better to cry when you need to then laugh it off and leave the tears for another day.
