Growing up, I depended 100% on you. To do my laundry, cook my meals, take me places. But most importantly, I depended on you to teach me well. To ensure that I would have the ability to do all those things for myself the you once did for me. I also needed you to teach me right from wrong, to listen to my conscience, not to give into peer pressure, etc. I needed you to teach me how to be a “good girl/boy”.
But now, I’m grown. I can cook just about anything I want, even if it means looking it up on youtube or googling it to find it out. I can do my own laundry and drive a car. I can also tell you why it’s better to stay in on a Friday night and do homework rather than go out and party. I can say no to my friends when they want me to do something I don’t want to do. You taught me that I can do all these things on my own. So I am.
When I do something I want to do, I’m going to do it no matter what you say. If I feel like I should go on a random trip out of state, and have my own money to do so, then you should be okay with it. If I don’t want to leave my bed for three days straight, I won’t and that’s okay. It’s time that you learn something from me now.
You need to learn that I’m going to be fine. I’m going to do what is right without the constant reminder. I’m going to make some mistakes but I’m only human and I promise I will learn from them. So you don’t have to spend every waking moment concerned as to what I’m doing, where I’m at, or if I ate a healthy meal that day. I've learned how to be my own person thanks to your help and encouragement.
I’m not saying I don’t need you anymore, because that’s not true. I need you to take a different role in parenting now: being the listener and advice giver, the friend. You are always going to be my mom/dad. There’s nothing that will ever change that. So I will still come to you when I need some advice or just want someone to talk to. I do not, however, need the judgmental comments that are surely going through your head. Those make me feel like a child and do more harm than good, trust me. After all, no matter what you say, I’m still the stubborn child I was a handful of years ago and will do it regardless. I need to know that you are there to listen to me and help me out.
You are more than just a bank. More than just a friend. More than just a chef. A laundry do-er. A cleaning maid. A psychiatrist. You are more than all these things because you are my parent and I love you. You taught me well. Now watch your hard work succeed.
