It was June when Donald Trump made the announcement that would change the world. With his hair billowing in the air conditioning, Trump declared that only he could "make America great again." We've heard this rant before. Trump would announce his bid, then withdraw as soon as it got serious. It was a joke. But as time went on, and Trump joined the ranks of the 16 republican candidates and rose above them in the polls, we stopped laughing. Sorta.
Last Thursday night was one for the history books. Jon Stewart was leaving "The Daily Show," and Fox was hosting the first two-tiered GOP debate of the election season, which provided more Fox network entertainment than "American Idol" ever did.
Although I tuned in to mostly mock the GOP presidential debate, I learned much about the Republican Party from the Thursday night debate.
1. Hillary Clinton is synonymous with Satan.
I bet she signs that at the end of her emails.
2. Everyone on stage owes Trump at least $20.
Which he will bring up any chance he gets.
3. Chris Christie is in love with Obama.
Watch out Michelle, someone's been hugging your man.
4. Jeb Bush is not his brother, George. Or so he says.
I mean, have you ever seen both of them in the same room?
5. Rosie O'Donnell and Trump have not reconciled.
So it's safe to say he doesn't have her vote.
6. Ted Cruz is tough on immigration.
Despite the fact that his last name is "Cruz."
7. Obama has somehow passed illegal and unconstitutional legislation.
But Marco Rubio will fix it.
8. Rand Paul is tough on immigration.
But will he build a wall?
9. Trump cannot promise he won't destroy the Republican Party.
But would that be bad?
10. Ben Carson is a doctor.
Because brain surgery isn't really harder than being president.
11. No one watched the first tier debate.
Otherwise known as the Loser Table.
12. The only relevant Democratic candidate is Hillary.
Sorry, Bernie. Guess no one else is #feelingtheBern
However, despite the fact that every candidate had their moment Thursday night, the name on everyone's lips the following day was not Chris Christie's. Or even good old Ted Cruz. It was Trump's.
Although his support is shaky, as shaky as his moral high ground, he is mentioned on every media outlet, from Fox News to CNN to MSNBC. We are all talking about him, which is ultimately what every presidential hopeful wants.
The question remains, who won the debate? If you ask me, I'd say Ben Carson. But in reality, it doesn't matter who was the most eloquent, or who had the greatest retorts. All that matters is who's name you hear the most. All that matters is who's name you remember in the voting booth.
