Congratulations! You’ve finally finished high school! Four years of stress, tears, and copious mountains of essays have gotten you to this point. Now that you’ve gotten over that hump, you have one final stretch of summer before you reach the proverbial Mecca that is college. These last few months are your last chance to enjoy the final throes of childhood. As I also prepare to endure this time, I have decided to compile a list of fun, healthy activities to help you take full advantage of this summer break.
1. Loaf around.
You’ve put in work for four whole years, and you and your brain definitely deserve a break. Take relaxation to the max. Lay in bed, stare at your phone, and be as sedentary as possible for as long as possible. When the time for university rolls around, your muscles will be coiled, unused, and ready to pounce into your freshman year, and that totally justifies all the nothing you’ve done.
2. Panic.
Think about it: the time to enter university is approaching. Let that really sink in. Now allow the ensuing thoughts to follow, "Oh my gosh! College is rapidly approaching! Do you know what that means? Adulthood! Adult responsibilities! Making my own appointments! Being fully responsible for my own diet! Going grocery shopping by myself! Sound the alarm! Sound the alarm! This is a DEFCON 1 level threat! AAAAAAH!"
3. Cry.
Mull this over with me, about the fact that I’m going to be going away for college. Everything’s sinking in, really. My childhood is actually over. I’m going to have to keep myself afloat as an actual, full grown, semi-mature adult. People can really judge me now if I let my mom pick out my outfits, or if I order myself a Happy Meal at McDonald’s. Life is really changing, man. *Sobs loudly.*
4. Get a summer job (at Plankotopolis, if you can swing it.)
Because you’re an ADULT NOW, GOSH DARN IT! ADULTS NEED TO MAKE MONEY, and you make MONEY by WORKING for THE MAN!!! So buck up, partner, and practice becoming a slave to the capitalist system in which we all reside. This is your life now.
5. Scream.
Whether it’s out of excitement, desperation, or that resultant panic from earlier, just scream! It’s a fast, easy way to release any pent-up tension, stress, despair, anguish, or excessive enthusiasm that this crazy transition may cause.
