Have you ever been told not to do something because it is not acceptable for someone of your gender to do it?

The other day I was having a conversation with my mother at home when I let a curse word slip. I guess I was still in my college state of mind and did not think anything of it. My mom was shocked by my use of such language. After a slight gasp and a disappointed shake of the head, she immediately informed me that "ladies do not cuss."

Something about her statement just did not sit right with me. "What do you mean?" I asked. "Why should I be reprimanded for cursing just because I am a girl?" In my past experiences, I have never heard someone tell a man not to swear because "men do not cuss."

Don't get me wrong, I know that using foul language can be extremely tacky and inappropriate in the wrong setting. What really made me angry was the fact that my own mother believed that swearing was an act reserved only for men. She justified her response by telling me that that was just what she had been raised to believe. The whole situation got me thinking about how many times I had been told not to do something because it was considered unsuitable for a lady to do, which makes it seem perfectly okay for a man to do it. I call it the "act like a lady" excuse.

Girls are raised to believe that they should be held to a separate standard than their male counterparts. "Quit rolling around on the ground; ladies do not get grass stains," mothers tell their daughters. "No respectable lady stays out past midnight," says a lecturing father while his son runs rampant into the late hours of the night. "Ladies do not shout," a teacher scolds her student.

I am not saying that there is anything wrong with the basic message adults are trying to get across about the behaviors, but they should never use someone's sex as an excuse for why they cannot or should not do something. Instead, both girls and boys alike should just be taught what's right and wrong without justifying the lesson by claiming that males or females simply do not do that.

Thankfully, we live in a day and age where most people are really trying to achieve fairness between the sexes on a large scale, but I think we sometimes forget the little habits of inequality that people have developed over time and do not even notice they are doing. I believe that if we are ever truly going to create a world where men and women are no longer held to separate standards, we have to start by changing what we teach the new and upcoming generation. They need to know that it is not okay to use the "act like a lady" (or man) excuse to justify why someone can or cannot do something.