Saying goodbye. We all have to do this at some point in our lives, and for most people saying goodbye occurs more than they might wish. It could be more of a see you later, or maybe a we'll be together again soon, or it could be a final and absolute goodbye forever. No matter what goodbye is being made, most of us have drastically different ways of going about it.

There are some people, the well adjusted people some of us are envious of, who have mastered the heart-wrenching art of saying goodbye. Even when they have to say the most difficult of goodbyes, they somehow find a way to accomplish it without stumbling through the process. They can say it with a smile, back it up with a hug, and face the separation head on, and fearlessly. While these people may still feel like falling apart on the inside, they have figured out how to keep themselves intact at least for long enough to get through the goodbye.

At the other end of the spectrum are the people who tense up at the mere thought of saying goodbye to someone they truly care about. These people tend to have quite interesting ways of going about it. Some are hit with such a heavy sadness that they cannot help but let it out, with emotions spilling through the cracks they were trying to keep filled up, at least until the goodbye is completed. Then there are the people who find no other way to handle what they are feeling than to lash out. To express so much anger or frustration that they worry they are simply going to push the person they love away. It is not as simple as just taking a breath and letting go of the anger, it can feel impossible to just relax when all they can think about is the separation they know is coming. However we say goodbye, it is a part of life we unfortunately cannot run away from.

There are a hundred different types of goodbyes and just as many ways to handle them, but in most cases, saying goodbye will never be an easy task to complete. Just knowing that you will be saying goodbye in a few days, or a couple hours, or even in the very next instant, is enough to put a heavy weight onto your chest. The kind of weight that grips at your heart and numbs your body to the tips of your fingers. Whether you are the one leaving, or the one watching someone else walk away, a true goodbye between people who honestly care will never be something that is easy to move on from.

While it may feel impossible to recover from saying goodbye, there are ways to heal that wound. Once you have made it past the initial stages of grieving (you know the ones everyone is always going on about: denial, anger, bargaining, depression, acceptance), you are then able to release some of the tension that has been building since you said the goodbye. You can turn to friends, who will tell you all of the reasons why you are going to be just fine, and why you are undeniably amazing. You could use one of the classic coping methods people are constantly promoting, such as taking up journaling and spilling your thoughts onto an empty page, attending a yoga class,
weightlifting (if you're not a fan of having your own leg wrapped around your face), finding a song you love and playing it until you wake up hearing it, or finding a new hobby (maybe you are a world class knitter) -- you never know. Whichever method you go with, saying goodbye does not have to be an unmanageable obstacle in your life, there are too many goodbyes for you to let every one of them stop you in your tracks.

The truly good news is, in many cases you will see the person you are missing again. Maybe they left to go to an out-of-state university, or they are studying abroad for a year. Maybe they needed to move away for a job, or have joined the military and are only leaving because it is their duty. Whatever it may be, it is incredibly important to keep in mind that, in most situations, you are only saying goodbye for now, not forever. It may seem like the weight will never go away, but just give it time, saying goodbye doesn't have to feel like the end of everything.