Right now I am scrolling through Netflix's Halloween Favorites section and just stumbled upon one of the best Halloween movies to date-- The Addams Family. When your best friend tells you that she's never seen the movie, there's only one thing to do. Without further ado, here are 88 thoughts everyone has while watching The Addams Family.
1. IT'S STARTING
2. I don't remember it starting out with a Christmas carol?
3. Duh duh dun dun *snap* *snap*
4. Yeesh these opening credits are long.
5. Okay now it's starting.
6. THING!
7. Wow I forgot how weird this family is-- I love it.
8. My roommate and I are weirdly attracted to Gomez.
9. Do you wanna sword fight?
10. So are the Addams vampires or...?
11. I need to get me a Thing.
12. Gordon has a face that only a mother could love, the poor thing.
13. Now that I'm older, you'd think this movie would be less confusing.
14. Did Wednesday just tell Pugsley to stop wielding a cooking knife as if he was just doing spitballs?
15. That moment you realize that Thing is faster than you.
16. Gordon is festering a plan...hahaha
17. Gordon is now known as Fester-but-not-Fester.
18. Parents just say that they visited the Bermuda Triangle on vacation and Wednesday tells Fester-but-not-Fester that nobody leaves the Bermuda Triangle...what?
19. Can we just all agree that we all want to be Wednesday?
20. Lol wtf.
21. Does Thing think he's a dog?
22. Again...what?
23. *Wednesday asks Gordon to pass the salt*. Morticia: What do we say? Wednesday: NOW
24. Why is there a random stop sign in the kitchen?
25. Ok but I want a slide that goes on forever.
26. THE ADDAMS HAVE A RIVER??
27. Gomez has a beautiful voice.
28. Oh hey, it's Gringotts down here.
29. Jk it's just a giant safe in the basement that's surrounded by water that looks like Italy. No big deal.
30. That wine glass is as big as Fester-but-not-Fester's head.
31. Gomez's Funniest Home Videos.
32. At least Wednesday knows that Gordon is a fraud.
33. That face when Morticia allows her daughter to electrocute her son, even though they're late to the charity ball.
34. Frankenstein is driving a car. I repeat: Frankenstein is driving a car.
35. Gomez has a play train station that runs on Diesel.
36. Is this train station some kind of oracle?
37. Again...wtf.
38. "We gladly feast on those that would subdue us." You know, just your typically family motto.
39. I wish I could say no just as assuredly as Morticia when asked if I have financial troubles.
40. So they're finally catching on that Fester is not actually Fester.
41. Gomez: "I hate him, he sucks...my God he IS Fester." (Me, with my siblings).
42. Morticia and Gordon watching the children's play would be me as a parent.
43. They're so proud of their children sword fighting on stage.
44. Moriticia and Gomez are goals.
45. Gomez: Tish, how long has it been since we've waltzed?
46. Morticia: Oh Gomez...hours.
47. Abnormal is a strong word lady.
48. Wednesday looks like me when I dance.
49. Fester and Gomez fought over conjoined twins? Ok.
50. What is Gomez wearing?
51. Wanna sword fight? Or sword dance?
52. I never realized how messed up this movie was.
53. Is this lady flirting with Rapunzel?
54. "I'm just your mother. You only owe me your entire existence."
Says every mother out there.
55. Frankensteins name is Lurch.
*I knew that, but this is the first time they've said his name.
56. I want the Addams' books please.
57. Dude did Fester-not-Fester just put a restraining order on the Addams? Please, let karma hit him.
58. They all look so sad.
59. Thing is pulling a wagon. What am I doing with my life?
60. There's a billboard asking me what I want on my tombstone? Brb I need a minute to think about this.
61. Are Wednesday and Pugsley running a lemonade-but-not-lemonade stand.
62. That moment when Morticia is telling stories to a kindergarten class.
63. Same.
64. Thing is using Pugsley as a bed who is using Lurch as a bed.
65. Morticia has her thinking face on.
66. THEY'RE TORTURING MORTICIA.
67. I'd like to see their face when Gomez shows up.
68. Thing should be a hand model.
69. Thing knows sign language.
70. And Morse code.
71. GOMEZ IS IN THE HOUSE I REPEAT HE'S IN THE HOUSE.
72. Wanna sword fight? For real?
73. Gomez has such swag.
74. Psh a gun is a coward's weapon.
75. The look Morticia and Gomez give the evil mother when she interrupts their kiss is priceless.
76. Gordon just wanted to be loved.
77. Yeesh Gomez and Morticia are kinky. Are you sure this is a kid's movie?
78. Gordon literally just released a hurricane on his mother.
79. "Are they dead?" "Does it matter?"
80. Wait Rapunzel is a he.
81. Wednesday is a homocidal maniac for Halloween. iCannot.
82. So Uncle Fester-who-isn't-Uncle-Fester has now become Uncle Fester?
83. What is this heartwarming music right now?
84. I need chocolate.
85. MORTICIA IS PREGNANT.
86. With an alien? Because that baby onesie has four legs.
87. Again...Morticia and Gomez are goals.
