Don't worry, sweet girl. Nothing is wrong with you. You're not a bad person. You're not broken. You're not ruined. You're just a little lost. No, you're not yourself lately. You haven't been in a long time. But, don't worry sweet girl, she still lives inside of you. You may not see her right now, but trust me, she's there. Somewhere inside of you, that girl is still there. She still loves the color pink, still finds joy in singing and she still screams the words to Twenty One Pilots when she thinks no one is listening. She's there. She may be under a broken heart, a lost soul, a few thousand tears and a confused mind, but I promise you she's there. And she wants to come back. You just gotta help her. I'll explain.

First things first. Rule number one. You gotta let him go, sugar. You have to stop caring about that boy because he doesn't care about you anymore. He doesn't care that everything makes you think of him, he doesn't care that you cry yourself to sleep some nights, and he doesn't care that you still need him. So stop. Knock it off already, would ya. Stop caring about him.

You need to stop thinking about him, and you need to stop crying yourself to sleep, and you need to stop needing him. I know that it doesn't seem like it right now, but you will love again. And even more impossible sounding and better than that, someone is going to love you again. Someone else is going to think that you're beautiful, someone else is going to want to spend time with you, and someone else is going to fall in love with you.

He'll fall in love with the way that you look when you feel uncomfortable. He'll fall in love with the way that your eyes twitch when you feel nervous. He'll fall in love with the way that you talk in your sleep. He'll fall in love with the way your leg taps whenever you're anxious. He'll fall in love with the way that you scrunch your nose because you don't know how to respond to his compliments. And he'll fall in love with the way that you love him. Heck, he'll even fall in love with the way you get when you're jealous or mad at him for no reason or too stubborn to admit that you're wrong or cry all of the time. He will love you more than you've ever been loved because he will see how great you are and how lucky he is that you picked him. And you're gonna love him back, so much. So much that you're going to forget why pink lemonade makes you puke or why you hate the color orange, or braces make you angry, or that your heart was ever broken, or that you ever loved anyone before him. You will know it's meant to be. Not because you need him, but because he needs you. You will save him princess because you are a prize.

Rule number two: she's not ugly. I know that you do not like her, you don't have to like her. Heck, I don't expect you to like her. You do not owe her absolutely anything, and you don't have to want them to be happy. However, you are too good to hate her. It's a waste of your time and it's a waste of your emotions. It's draining, isn't it? And you don't need that. So no, I'm not saying that you have to give her a chance or that you even have to get to know her before you judge her, but you are not allowed to hate her. Not for her sake. And not for his sake. But for you.

You don't need to hate her. No, she's not as pretty as you, no she doesn't have a clue what you know about him, and no she'll never really appreciate his flaws the way that you did...but, it doesn't matter. He's allowed to love her, she's allowed to love him, and you're allowed to be upset. But on that same note. He's allowed to love her, she's allowed to love him, and you're allowed to let both of them go. So if that means you need to block her, block her. But ripping her apart and judging their relationship is only torturing you.

Rule number three, forgive him. Being angry is not letting go. He broke your heart, so what? Forget him. You are not going find peace until you really move on. And you aren't really going to move on until you forgive him. And I don't mean a bull crap apology that you pretend is an apology but it's really just you blaming him.

Here, let me help you out. Examples of what not to do:

"I'm sorry you didn't know how to love me." "I'm sorry that I was too good for you." "I'm sorry that you didn't appreciate everything that I did for you." I know you so well don't I? Look I know that it doesn't seem fair, but at the risk of sounding cliche, life is so unfair. Sometimes we have to do things that we don't really want to do. Especially forgiving.

You see, forgiveness speaks not of someone else's behavior but of your character. So forgive him. Forgive him for breaking your heart, forgive him for misleading you, forgive him for not loving you anymore. Forgive him, not because he asked for forgiveness, or even realizes that he's done you a terrible injustice. Forgive him not because he deserves it or because the pain he caused you isn't worth feeling. Forgive him because it shows your level of maturity and your willingness to understand that life isn't fair. Forgive him. Forgive the boys that bullied you in high school, forgive the friend that told your secret, forgive the girls that didn't invite you to their sleepover, forgive the person that picked someone over you, forgive the parent that doesn't always understand what's wrong, forgive them. Forgive all of them. Again, not because they deserve it, but because you do.

Rule number four, do the things that make you the happiest. Who cares if you have to wake up at 5:30 in the morning sometimes, or if you're not that good, or if you'll never share your thoughts with the world, or if it doesn't look that great, or if some days you have to use more filters than others. Play basketball until your feet fall off, sing until your throat swells up, write any and everything that comes to mind and call it poetry, color..color..and color some more, and take all of the selfies that your phone can store. These things make you happy. They give you joy. So you deserve to do them, even when people say that you aren't good enough, or no one wants to read what you have to say, or your coach won't put you in every game. That's not why you're doing it. You're doing it because it makes you happy and you deserve to be happy.

Rule number five: You do deserve to be happy. Stop accepting the crap that comes to you just because you don't think that you're worth anything more. You're so special and you deserve to be happy. See, I don't know when your self-esteem turned to crap, but that's the issue. That's your problem. It's not that you used to have a self-harm addiction, or that you aren't "pure" enough anymore, or that you made yourself throw up that one time, or you weren't that nice to your friends and parents for a large chunk of your life...no, that's not the problem. The problem is that you think that determines the amount of happiness you're allowed to feel. You're not perfect. Heck, you're not close. And you're never going to be perfect or close, so let it go. You're human and you suck sometimes, but that doesn't mean that you have to accept when sucky things happen to you. I mean, they will, it's a part of life. A sucky part, but it's inevitable. And despite what you think, your past is just that and that's all it ever should be.

Rule number six: Stop taking your friends for granted. Yes, you love them. Of course you do. And they know that. But that doesn't mean that you can treat them any way that you feel like it. Yeah, they're always there for you. And yes, they should be. It is their job, you're right. But they don't have to do it. They don't have to love you. They choose to and you are so lucky that they do. You'd be complete trash without them, so why do you refuse to appreciate them the way you should? Don't make them cry. Don't tell them anything but how much you love them. And never leave them wondering if they're good enough. Because they are. And it doesn't hurt to tell them that every once in a while or every single day. So: Thank you. I'm sorry. I love you. And also, sometimes they need to talk too. It's not always about you, so learn to listen as much as you vent.

Rule number seven. Your mental illness doesn't define you. At all. It's nothing compared to what you've been through. Compared to what you've been through, just to be breathing right now. Yes it's hard, and yes, it's overwhelming and yes, it's mean, but you are so much better than it. So don't listen to the voices, don't let the sadness consume you, and don't let a diagnosis define you. Please try to love yourself because you are lovely. I mean, sure you have a few repressed memories, a couple of secrets and lots of scars, but you don't give yourself nearly enough credit. You are so strong. You are so brave. I mean, who else could look a bully named depression, bipolar, anxiety, psychosis or bulimia right in the eye? I mean really, look it in the eye and say not today. And anytime it came back, kick your brain right in the balls and say not today. There's a reason you haven't given up yet. You're a superstar. An inspiration.

Lastly. Rule number eight: Jesus loves you. He always has and he always will. You know why? Because He's perfect. He cares so much for you that he chooses to hold all of your worries, problems and anxieties. I know about 4 months ago, you really would've believed that, but it's still true. You are His daughter and you are redeemed. Meaning, He gives you endless forgiveness and unconditional grace and you feeling bad for yourself just belittles what He did for you on the cross.

See, you were dating Jesus. And then you broke up with him. And not just broke up with him. But really hurt him. Cheated on him. But Jesus isn't like any boy or girl, see because He wants to get back together with you. He's waiting to take you back, all you have to do is ask. So stop wallowing. No, you don't deserve what He does for you but He knows that. And He does it anyway. So instead of crying about that, make yourself worthy. Of course you'll never really be. But put some effort into your relationship. Pray more. And really mean it. Go to church. And really mean it. Spend time with Him everyday. And really mean it. He loves you and He wants you back, so run to Him.

So what? You can't find her right now? It doesn't mean she's not there. You make sure to pray instead of worry, kiss your friends, love everyone because it's not that hard, sing in the grocery store, laugh out loud, give credit where it's due, be a good person, even when no one is looking, don't let people who are important to you become memories, pull all nighters, cry at the end of "The Fault in Our Stars," and remember that you're not so bad after all; then I know she'll be around in no time.

See, an old friend of mine has this poster and it says "some days you're the pigeon and some days your the statue." I love that poster. I thought it was funny at first, but if you really think about it, it's so true. Just because you feel like life is crapping on you now doesn't mean you'll never be flying high again. You just gotta hold out and keep on fighting.

Just because you can't find her right now doesn't mean you should stop looking. So, don't worry, sweet girl. Nothing is wrong with you. You're not a bad person. You're not broken. You're not ruined. You're just a little lost. No, you're not yourself lately. You haven't been in a long time. But, don't worry sweet girl, she still lives inside of you.

You may not see her right now, but trust me, she's there. Somewhere inside of you that girl is still there. She still loves the color pink, still finds joy in singing and she still screams the words to Twenty One Pilots when she thinks no one is listening. She's there. She may be under a broken heart, a lost soul, a few thousand tears and a confused mind, but I promise you she's there.

And she wants to come back. You just gotta help her. Now repeat after me, this too shall pass. No, really say it and really mean it. You and I both know that this isn't your first crap storm and we both know that it won't be your last. So, whenever you're feeling like the most pooped on statue in the world, repeat after me: This too shall pass. Oh yeah, and one last thing: when she comes back, tell her I've missed her, would ya?