Maybe you're lonely. Maybe you're simply bored. Maybe you're nostalgic. Somehow that inspires you to pick up your phone and hit up your old flame or old friend. What could be so wrong with that? It's not like it'll hurt you to just say hi and catch up. But the thing is, it will. Part of you is thinking that you're about to do something wrong, and that's because you are. Don't let loneliness trap you in a position you've already escaped.
1. There's nothing to gain.
Contrary to popular belief, there's nothing to gain, and you will lose something. Whether it's happiness, time, money, effort, or sanity, you're going to surely lose something. And none of those things sound too ideal to lose all for a moment of weakness.
2. You stopped talking for a reason.
If that was really a person you wanted in your life, they would still be there. Why is there confusion when it comes to this? Something in the past told you to leave the person alone, so follow that lead. Remember that people make time for people that matter in their lives. Write that one down.
3. You won't move on.
I know the memories in retrospect may seem pretty nice, but you're viewing everything from a warped perspective. In order to fully recover and move forward in life, you can't try to keep fixing something that's broken. You have to start something new. It'll be hard to do initially, but eventually it will happen, and you will feel happier than you could've imagined. It's time to let go of that extra baggage.
4. Your past will start to define you.
Remember how you used to look back and think that you never wanted to be in that position again? Well if you send that text, you'll be back where you started. Sometimes people bring you down to their level and you can become complacent in those situations. What you tolerate often is a reflection of who you are yourself.
5. You don't actually miss the person.
Let's be real. Maybe it's the attention you miss, the things you did together, having someone there for you or maybe the idealized version of the person you created, but it's not the actual person you miss. Trust me. Let it go and stop lying to yourself.
6. You're wasting time.
You're wasting your time, the other person's time, and everyone else's time too. You'll place yourself in the same cycle that you had just escaped. Chances are that you'll end up with the same results, so save yourself the time and effort, because it's not worth it to relive your past. Also, if you're trying to fix someone, it won't work. You can't fix someone who doesn't want to be fixed.
7. Things aren't the same anymore.
So if it's the old times that really have you feeling like you should hit them up, remember that's not what is currently happening. No one is stagnate in life, so you aren't going to find that exact person you've been looking for. People grow up and their interests may shift or maybe you realize they were never the person you thought they were in the first place. Don't try to rewrite history.
8. You'll be happier.
Okay so maybe you won't be initially happy, but you'll be able to truly find yourself, and then you'll be happier. It's guaranteed. Your life will be on the upswing.
If the past was meant to be, it would still be happening. There would be no need to refer to it as anything other than the present. I know that you are longing for something, and probably hurting too, but you need to keep going. As cliche as it sounds, don't look back, because you aren't going there.
