Well, America, it looks like we have our Republican nominee. When Trump announced that he was running for president, not many people took him seriously, including myself. However, after thorough research, I have decided that Trump makes the perfect presidential candidate. The following are my reasons why.
1. He's easy to understand.
If you've read any of his tweets or listened to his speeches, you may have noticed a lack of "big words." That's because, according to Politico Magazine, he speaks on a third- and fourth-grade level. Politics so easy your 9-year-old can understand them. Who needs eloquent speeches anyway?
2. He is brimming with confidence.
Some may call it Grade-A narcissism, but I call it an abundance of self-esteem. He regularly boasts about himself on his Twitter account. Nothing can beat the fact that he once bragged about himself while pretending to be his own spokesperson during a phone interview. Donald, don't let the haters get you down. You and I both know you are #flawless.
3. He respects women.
Everyone knows that Trump is a lady's man. Who could resist that hair? There is so much I could say about this topic. Instead, I'll let this list of Trump's statements about women speak for itself.
4. He sets a goal and talks about it a lot.
Policies be darned. As long as you loudly say what you want over and over again, anything is possible. Right?...Right.
5. He doesn't have any of that pesky "experience."
Who needs it, really? I mean, politicians are what is wrong with our society in the first place. I'm sure once Trump sits behind his desk in the Oval Office, all of the wisdom and training of two centuries worth of presidents will magically enter his brain. The country is counting on it.
6. Other countries love him.
Our foreign policy will flourish under his presidency. Between his ban on Islam and the wall he so adores, other nations are sure to follow his lead. America will be great again, y'all, and the whole world will know it.
7. He's a people-pleaser.
Trump will always tell you what you want to hear. He has changed his political opinions more times than can be counted. Stephen Colbert illustrated this perfectly by orchestrating his own Trump vs. Trump debate. Every day with Trump is a surprise! Who knows what you're going to get?
8. He would be our first orange president.
It's about time this minority was represented on the big political stage.
As you can see, Trump is the only logical choice in the 2016 election. Be informed. Go vote.
#MakeAmericaGreatAgain...?
