Teaching and learning happens every day to every person on earth. Whether it is a toddler learning to tie their shoes or an 80 year old war Vet who is learning how to live in a world of technology, learning is constant. Personally, learning new facts and how to do new things is one of my favorite pastimes. I believe that knowledge is power, but to be able to use that power justly you must learn how to. People are taught by many different individuals across the planet: mothers, fathers, sisters, brothers, teachers, friends and many more. We as humans learn lessons that make us stronger and lessons that dramatically change our outlook on life. Sometimes we let a lesson change our lives completely and sometimes the lessons we learn are just reinforcing the building blocks of our lives. The following are eight lessons that I have learned and let shape me as a person over my life and perhaps, they may shape you too.
1. Asking questions is the only way you’ll ever learn.
My mom always tells me I ask a lot of questions. But, I always respond that if you never ask you'll never know, and if you never know, you'll never grow. If you're curious about why something is the way it is, ask. Show that you're interested in something other than yourself. However, make sure that when you ask something you are doing it considerately and respectfully.
2. You can’t always get what you want.
Things in life don't always come easy and because of that I've learned that hard work is almost always necessary. However, putting in work for something doesn't always mean you'll get it. But sometimes, not getting what you want can offer the best possible outcome. When you want something and you can't have it, moving forward and acknowledging that it wasn't your time will make you stronger in the future.
3. Sometimes it's necessary to lose an argument.
Bruising your ego is a lot better than losing your relationships with people. Sometimes, it's necessary to lose an argument to keep a friend. You may be right, and they may be wholeheartedly mistaken about what you're arguing about, but take a second and think, is my being right more important than this friendship, relationship, or partnership? If it's not, fall back, retreat, and get over it.
4. Acknowledging others' triumphs doesn’t make you a failure.
In little league, coaches always tell the players, "Win or Lose, it's how you play the game." This statement couldn't be more applicable in the real world. How you live as a person, how you act toward others, and how you treat those who triumph even when you don't succeed defines you as a person. Rather than your actual achievements, how you react and treat your peers when you come in second and they come in first is important in defining your character. Just because another person is achieving right now, doesn't make you a failure.
5. Other people's secrets are never yours to share.
When someone tells you something in confidence, a secret or a hidden truth, they presumably expect you to keep it to yourself. I've learned that people will try and use you to hurt their enemies if it benefits them regardless of the cost to you. Keep in mind that when someone asks you to share a secret of some one else and you follow through, you are both showing that person you are untrustworthy and breaking the trust of you and the other individual. A secret about someone else's life is theirs to keep, share, or bury; they trusted you to listen and to not share it.
6. Never disregard a person for the smile on their face.
Everyone is fighting a battle of some sort, and sometimes the person with the biggest smile on their face is the one who is hurting the most. Don't brush off your friends, family, or strangers because they say they're fine. If you think something is wrong, ask about it. You may be the reason they keep going. Just because someone is smiling doesn't mean they don't feel like they're alone in the darkness. Take an interest, be the light in someone's dark tunnel.
7. Honesty is always the best policy.
When you lie, someone always ends up hurt when the truth comes out, and trust me when I tell you, the truth always comes out. This is why one of the most important lessons I have learned in life is that honesty is always the best policy. At the University of Portland, the school's motto is Veritas vos Liberabit, which translated from Latin is, "The truth will set you free." When you are honest, you show people that you think highly enough of them to give them the truth and that, is a gift that is irreplaceable. In being honest in friendships, relationships and every aspect of your life, you display a character trait unique in the corrupt and hurtful world of today.
8. You can’t help anyone if you’re hurting; put yourself first.
Last but certainly not least, I believe that one of (if not the most important) lessons I've learned in life is that you must put yourself first. While, yes, your parents, your family and your friends all hopefully care about what happens to you in life, your ultimate well being is your responsibility. This being said, everyone must realize that in order to do anything in life successfully, work, love, live or prosper, your mental, emotional, and physical health need to be put first. You can't drink juice through a broken straw and you can't water the flowers with a broken hose. Put you first and make yourself a priority and everything else will fall into place.
