Slut shaming. We've all done it, we've all been a victim of it, we've all complained about it. So why does it keep happening? Blame it on men if you want, but I've been slut shamed by other women far more times than I have been by men. And I'm here to tell you that I am so over it, and you should be too. Let's take a look at all the ways we slut shame our friends without really knowing what we've done.
When we look at our already tipsy friend and tell her not to have another drink because you just don't want her to make a bad decision.
Not only is this slut shaming our friend, by insinuating that alcohol is making her act overly sexual, but it's also pretty unfair to the guys at the party. Rape happens, in no way am I denying that, but let's not assume that every guy at the party will take advantage of the wasted girl. (Side note: alcohol is not a reason for rape, rapists are.)
When we silently (or not so silently) judge the length of our friend's skirt.
You may only tell your friend that her skirt is too short if she's getting dressed for an occasion which requires more of a business look...and then you may only tell her it is too short if she asks your opinion.
When we point out all the flirting our friend is doing.
So what? She wants to flirt with that cute football player or the cute waiter, good for her! I think we all know that it takes a brave soul to flirt with really cute guys, especially if we don't know them that well, so let your friend show off a little.
When our friend trusts us with information about her sex life...and we just act like she's crazy.
Come on ladies, sex is a big scary thing and it's not okay to make a friend feel guilty about it. Obviously this friend trusts you and needs someone to talk to, don't make her feel bad.
When she's hooking up with a guy, and you ask her what the point of hooking up is.
Well, because she wants to. Unless you have a legitimate concern about her health or safety, don't you dare shame her for exploring a different type of relationship.
When you constantly gossip about who's hooking up with who.
Yeah, I get it, I'm nosy too. But it's actually not cool to sit around and talk about who's with who and how many people they've been with and how long they've been with someone before *you know what*. It's none of your business!
When you say "I would never act like that"
I'll admit that I said this when I was younger. But come on ladies, you don't know what that other girl is going through, or what's actually going on with the situation you're judging. Can we all get over ourselves already?
