Recently I had the pleasure of chaperoning a community service learning trip to Philadelphia composed of 40 high school students from my Alma mater. While I have done this numerous times before, this time I was struck by how much could be learned from these younger students. High school students are in a unique position because they are mostly grown, yet still live at home. The face "high school drama" - someone so many of us lament about at college and have the luxury of extra large support systems. While many may want to argue that these students are immature and should instead learn from us college students, I think the lessons go both ways. Here are the top things I learned from the students I had the pleasure of working with.
1. Be Kind.
Of course as the trip was based around service learning it's participants were bound to be kind. However, many of them went above and beyond. A few students gave their lunches to homeless individuals and even more were openly and obviously concerned with the well being of the other students, even ones they didn't know well. So many times I saw an arm go around a peer that was struggling, upset or even just tired. Sadly, a lot of this important character trait is lost on many college students. We walk by people who need support without offering it and are more willing to complain about our own stress than to help diminish the stress of others.
2. Don't Be Afraid to Get Dirty.
On more than one work site the students got dirty - very dirty. Gardening, working in dusty workhouses and shifting manure were all on the menu for these kids and I never hear anyone complain. I have rarely seen my own peers so willing to get dirty for something important, or for fun. I think we've all forgotten how much fun a little mud is.
3. Girls Are Strong.
When I was involved in this program in high school, we also found ourselves hearing, "I need 3 strong males for this" or "Can all the guys help over here?" I remember how frustrating that was and it was even more frustrating to see these students still hearing the same things. One thing I was really proud of, however, was the students' reactions to comments such as these. Often, one or two of the female students would just go for it. Just as often one of the male students would say something like, "Hey, the girls can do that too". Sadly, college campuses are often inherently sexist. There are different rules for fraternities than there are for sororities, dorms are often segregated by sex and at least on my campus, there are different senior awards for males and females. Most of us are use to this and live with it. However, I think it's important that we remember that women can do just as much as the men.
4. Boys Are Sensitive.
We often focus on the sexism faced by women on a regular basis. Yet, we can't forget that sexism does affect the guys too - just a bit differently. One thing that has always struck me was society's belief that real men don't cry. This is BS. Plain and simple. During the trip I saw many male students dig deep into their emotions and talk about them openly. I saw more than one cry. Were they any less for it? No. Any weaker? No. And they were not judged for it. Us college students need to get to this point. I can't remember a time were a male peer showed his emotions publicly, while I have seen many female students do just that. We need to create a safe space and make it known that all humans have emotions and none are weaker for it.
5. Reflect Daily.
Part of the service learning model requires reflection at the end of each day. What did you learn? What struck you the most? What would you do differently? How do you feel? I think a lot of us don't reflect on our days like that - either because we're too tired, too busy or think it's pointless. If you think about it, that's really sad. College is all about learning who you are and discovering what you need to be happy. College is also about - surprising I know - learning. How well are we really learning about ourselves and our coursework if we don't pause on a regular basis to mull it all over? We need to journal more, blog more (here's the students' blog), and meditate more.
6. Do The Job, Then More...And Take Joy In It.
Usually at a site the students were given a task to complete - fill all these boxes with food, clear all the weeds from this area, sort these bags of food. Time and time again I saw the students do these jobs quickly and completely, only to move on to some other task they could see needed to be done. And the best part? They had way too much fun doing it. I heard students talk about how weeding for six hours was the most fun they've had in a long time. Why don't we take that much joy in our work? We have the opportunity to learn from amazing professors, surrounded by our friends. Yet, we all seem to focus on how hard it is instead of basking in how awesome this opportunity is. And doing more than we have to? Rare, if even existent.
7. Poke Fun At Yourself.
We ended the week with a little competition. Teams competed for points in categories such as tallest person, best animal noise and weirdest talent. I have been in numerous groups in college that would never have been so willing, yet alone excited, to participate in such a game. I think we all need to remember to stop taking ourselves too seriously.
