"Everybody makes mistakes."
"It's okay to mess up."
"Nobody is perfect."
Statements like these are constantly thrown around to remind us that as humans, we are automatically prone to imperfections and flaws that can result from the chaos of life. However, overachievers and perfectionists, in all of their stubborn glory, tend to ignore such statements (true as they may be) and charge at life full throttle like a bull in a China shop. That is who we are. This is how we choose to live our life and our struggles can be characterized by the following:
1. We don't take criticism well. The expectation that all of our work is impeccable means that our flaws anger us easily, and hearing it from other people just further exacerbates our anger. It's not that we are mad at the criticism, it's that we are angry with ourselves for allowing such mistakes to happen in the first place.
2. We almost always refuse to settle for mediocrity. It's all or nothing, and anything less than that makes us sick to our stomachs. Straight A's are a mandatory. Being #1 is a must and mediocrity becomes the new below average.
3. Because of our constant strive for perfection, we usually put a lot of pressure on ourselves--too much pressure--and we simply cannot help it no matter what people tell us. Everything is high stakes for us--from that petty 10 point reflection paper to that 100 point test. It doesn't matter to us because everything counts, and messing up is not an option.
4. The biggest obstacle for us is ourselves because we hold ourselves to standards that exceed others' expectations. Our minds are restless, and the mental games we play with ourselves can keep us awake at night. We psych ourselves out constantly. Our fears of being anything less than extraordinary, our appetite to devour the next challenge that lies ahead or simply thinking about life in all of its randomness means that the light bulbs in our brains refuse to turn off.
5. We try to accomplish too many tasks in a given time period. In the world of over-achieving and perfection, we don't understand the meaning of the word "limitations." We feed our pride and egos by loading up on as much work as possible to keep our restless minds occupied. That way, we have a complete checklist of things we've accomplished that we can look back upon fondly.
6. We are never satisfied with our accomplishments. Even with the heavy workload we take on, we still hunger for more. No matter what we do, we will never feel completely fulfilled. This can be dangerous, as it puts unnecessary stress on us psychologically and makes overall happiness more difficult to obtain.
7. When we crash, we burn out--badly. The point we reach in which we can't take the self-induced pressure and stress, the endless stream of thoughts and the long list of tasks is the point in which we shut down. We feel useless, wallowing in the mess of perceived failure that in reality isn't as bad as we think it is. We turn the other way, ashamed to show our faces, and we confine ourselves into the deepest darkest hole possible where nobody can find us. Burn out is probably the second worst thing to the fear of failure that perfectionists and over-achievers struggle with.
Those that seek greatness beyond measure often receive a lot of crap for it.
"Why do you do this to yourself?"
"You work too hard."
"You're crazy."
While all of that may be true, we pride ourselves on our ability to succeed and frankly don't care what people say. Our mindset is the source of that constantly craved adrenaline rush. Amidst all of our craziness and insanity of being overachievers and perfectionists, the great words of Wreck it Ralph still stand: "There's no one I'd rather be than me."
