The 7 Deadly Stages of Crushing, As Told By Rachel Green | The Odyssey Online
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The 7 Deadly Stages of Crushing, As Told By Rachel Green

There's a little Rachel Green in all of us.

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The 7 Deadly Stages of Crushing, As Told By Rachel Green
Netflix

If there’s anyone who knows about crushes, it’s me, and I don’t consider that a bad thing. My first crush was named James, and in preschool, he was the Hulk for Halloween. Since then, I’ve found myself crushing on many other people, all of them equally as devastating as the one before. However, if there’s any character who could say it better than I could, it’s Rachel Green.

1. Thinking about how good looking he is

The most enjoyable stage of crushing. Constantly daydreaming about how curly his hair is, or his big blue eyes. Nothing can go wrong, right?

2. Wishing you weren't alone

The most emotionally wrecking stage of crushing. It’s 2 a.m. and it finally hits you, you’re still alone. You try and tell yourself that you’re off the market, but in reality, the only thing you’re committed to is your latest Netflix show and a pint of Ben and Jerry’s.

3. Convincing yourself he feels the same way

The most exhausting stage of crushing. Making up reasons to think that he actually does like you, like the fact that he’s wished you “Happy Birthday” every year since you met, or that he waves back to you in the hallways.

4. Creating scenarios in your head that will probably never happen

The most dangerous stage of crushing. He’s really in your head now, and you’re telling yourself that despite all odds, things will work out. You’ve even got future dog names picked out. Any second now, he’s going to be at your doorstep telling you how he hasn’t been able to get you off of his mind. Trust me, he’ll probably have a great excuse for why he’s been avoiding you.

5. Questioning why you're so hung up over someone who probably hasn't even thought about you twice

The most damaging stage of crushing. You’re slowly but surely giving up hope because let’s face it, he would’ve called by now. Deep down, you want to be angry and hurt, but you really have no reason to because he was never really yours in the first place.

6. Coming to the realization that he's always going to be just a crush

The most crushing stage of crushing. That’s the thing about crushes, they literally crush you. You’ve finally realized that no matter how many scenarios you created in your head, he’ll never be anything more than just a crush.

7. Trying to forget all about him

The most potentially-liver-damaging stage of crushing. How you choose to try to forget about him is all up to you, but let's face it, a night out with your girls (and maybe a fifth) is never a bad option.

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This article has not been reviewed by Odyssey HQ and solely reflects the ideas and opinions of the creator.
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