I am officially 22! I am celebrating not ONLY my Taylor Swift year but also my GOLDEN year. Guess where I am doing it!? I am living in Uganda for the month! I got to return to Rwanda last month exactly five years since I was there on my first mission trip. Life is so crazy! It got me to thinking about how much I have grown and how much I wish I knew growing up. I will be 22 and a half when I return to the United States, so I have some more time to consider new goals and who I am going to be when I start "real life" again. I was inspired to write out some of the lessons I have learned for you…

1. Don't let anyone else determine your future

I was almost going to get married and live a life I wasn't certain about because I was in love. I am not telling you not to sacrifice things to make a relationship work, I am telling you to sacrifice the right things. Don't sacrifice the things that make you, you! Make sure you are always reaching your goals before you are helping someone reach theirs. What do you want your future to look like!?

2. Work hard, but don't miss out on life

I spent my college years acting like I was already out of college. It wasn't until my last semester that I let myself dive into that culture and dang it was fun. I loved all the opportunities given to me that helped me grow more quickly in my dream career, but regret missing out on all of what life had to offer me too. It's all about balance.

3. Boys aren't your purpose

The moment I got my first actual boyfriend in high school, I never went another day being single. After the end of every relationship, I was looking for the next guy to fill that "void" of being wanted, needed, etc. Please don't do what I did. It's totally okay to justs be single. I think if I had stayed single for awhile, I would have spent more time considering what my standards actually were instead of accepting whatever was available. Don't get me wrong, the guys I dated, even in high school, were quality people, but I don't think I was ready for those relationships. Don't make boys your main focus.

4. Making healthy habits at a young age

You know those days in high school where you thought you were fat, then you got to college wishing you were the size you were in high school when you thought you were fat? I found old journals of 15/16 year old 110 pound me writing notes about wanting to be 100 pounds and tracking macros?? Excuse me?? Those were the days I also ate like crap because I could, but I was physically active for hours a day so the bad eating didn't affect me until I was in college. I wish I could have started healthier life habits in high school. I wish I knew the importance of quality and organic food, daily movement, self-care physically and mentally, as well as overall happiness in who I was. Being on the world race, I had to figure that out and focus on the fact that I would gain weight with this much travel and stress and focus more on what was going into my body and how I was taking care of it, regardless if I was a size 0 or 2 or even 4!

5. Prioritize your self-care

The word "self-care" can mean something different to everyone. Think about what brings you joy, peace, and a refreshed state of mind. It is pretty simple and self-explanatory. Don't feel guilty for putting it first. You can't keep pouring out if you are not being filled up.

6. Don't procrastinate

Case in point. This was my attitude throughout high school and college. I'm a very last minute person and I have mastered the art of BS. Being on the World Race, Wifi is super limited, so when I have Wifi I dig into my long to-do list and finish it all in one sitting. It has taught me to do what I need to do when I actually have the access to do so. Get a planner, schedule out what you need to do, do it, then reward yourself with a latte or pedicure.

7. Save your change

I HATE change. Like keeping track of pennies, nickels, etc. It's pretty frustrating. As a missionary, every penny TRULY counts because people barely use cards out here. When you use up your cash, you have to get more out from an ATM and pay a fee, so we are stingy on what we purchase and where. I love saving a few coins or extra dollars on something that could bless someone else or bless something I have to purchase for the team in the future. I am going to start saving my change to offer water to someone on the side of the road or just in case a friend is in need if they ran out of cash in the moment. I like to think there is a purpose behind everything.

8. Minimize your closet

This is a HUGE lesson I have learned while living in 11 countries in 11 months out of one bag. I had to consider all weather types, where we would live, and free days full of hiking, swimming, and different activities. ALL IN ONE BAG. It made me realize… I only need like 5 shirts to be happy. I am not saying dump out everything you have, but I started this thing where before I buy anything if it's not a "this is my only opportunity to purchase" situation, I give myself 24 hours to think on it. By then, I'll know if I actually need or want it.

9. Be curious

Please don't go through life barely learning or exploring anything. Please keep studying, learning, and growing. Be curious and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.

10. Go out of your way to be intentional

Instead of a simple hello when you pass someone, add a "how are you" and actually be curious about it. Don't get too much in their business without an invitation but let people, even random strangers, know that you actually care. Once you start doing it, it becomes natural and then every conversation is lead with intentionality.

11. Allow accountability

Let people call you out and call you higher! Let people tell you no to that cookie when you want to eat healthier. Let people cancel plans if they know you need the night off. And do the same for your friends! Foster that culture in your group and in life.

12. Listen to your mom, she is always right

THIS. THIS x1000. I look back thinking, "My mom has been right in every situation" and now that I am out of the house and not under the rules of the house, I appreciate her advice so much more because I understand and accept it now. I treasure her opinions because she's so real about them, even when it's not what I want to hear. Listen to your mom because she can truly see the good, the bad, and the toxic relationships.

13. Give people the gift of freedom through forgiveness

Don't hold grudges. It's a burden on you, the people around you, and the person you have a problem with. Forgive them even if you don't want too. You don't have to maintain the relationship, but allow them to be free. That freedom will give you freedom as well. Who would want to live a life in chains?

14. Befriend your parents & family

I know being a high schooler with "controlling" parents can be hard, but I was lucky enough to have parents who supported me in everything I did. We still fought because I was a dramatic and hormonal teen, but becoming my parents' best friend was the best decision ever! I can tell my mom everything and anything. That's the thing about parents is that once you develop a relationship like that with them, they truly stick around through everything. Plus they know you better than anyone else.

15. Do your research

Don't live a life of ignorance. Do your research on things! Don't rely on twitter for political opinions or Facebook for religious views. Go out and explore! Have hard conversations where you discuss facts and not opinions. This goes a long with being curious! Create your own opinion for yourself.

16. Face your issues straight on

I am the queen of running away and ignoring problems because I am "too lazy" to deal with them. You know that feeling of just being tired of dealing with something? Just talk it out now, make your peace, then rest. The rest is more enjoyable when it is actually rest and not you perfecting what you should say mentally just to win the argument. Fight the battles worth fighting.

17. College is better than high school

To my youngin's out there, college is incredible compared to high school. High school does not define you and no matter what your teachers say or make you do, depending on your college it is probably 100% more laid back than what has been told to you. Hold on to that high school train until your graduate, that's when the magic happens.

18. Make creativity a part of your day to day

This is for everyone, regardless of what hobby you have adopted. Everyone has a creative side. It might be in sports, art, performance, etc. Let yourself have that each day. Let that part of yourself show. It's part of survival. I feel exhausted but restless when I am not being creative. I feel meaningless when my gifts are not being used. Find things to tap into each day to keep those juices flowing.

19. Physically make a board of goals

A dream board, goal board, prayer board, whatever you need board. Make it happen and put it in sight. Not just a mental note, but a physical object. Become attached to it. Make looking at it a part of your daily routine.

20. Invest, Invest, Invest

Invest in relationships, invest in your savings account, invest in your studies, do everything with intentionality. It would be wrong to say "give everything 100%" because really, you can't do that. Take it one step at a time but don't ignore something completely to give something else that whole part of you. Take investing seriously!

21. Be open minded

Your opinion isn't correct and it isn't incorrect. That's what makes opinions special because they are yours. Don't expect others to think the same way as you and don't force them to. Learn from them and if it makes you mad, move on. Opinions don't define a person, so be open minded on where people come from and focus more on what they offer the world.

22. Don't ever just be content

Don't sit back and just be content with what is next or what your life looks like right now. That's not what life is for. We were meant to grow, not be planted. Be happy, be ecstatic, be joyful, but never consider yourself to be "just content"

I hope these tips bring you joy and peace.

Love,

The newest 22 year old