Pain. Sadness. Frustration. You may think I'm describing my current emotional state, and you would be right because I just finished season five of "Shameless"! "Shameless" has definitely been to dark places before, but none could compare to this season. This was like season four of "Orange is the New Black" level of darkness. No joke.

Needless to say, it was hard for me to get through this season. Though there were a lot of great plot lines, new characters, and relationships that emerged, I was just so exhausted. Definitely more bad than good occurred and it feels like the show is continuing in this direction. I'm just hoping that any of these characters will be able to find a sort of self-fulfillment or at least some positive changes. But with Shameless, we know any sort of happiness is, unfortunately, short-lived.

On that happy note, here were my thoughts watching season five of "Shameless":

1. Oh my gosh, the opening of what you missed on last season of "Shameless" is lovely. Wonderful especially Mickey.

2. Awh, this Sean guy seems really nice.

3. Okay, Sammi is really getting on my nerves. I used to find her oddly charming, but now she’s just straight up gross and awful.

4. Awh, look at Mickey being a stand-up guy running his illegal business for his family. I love it.


5. Is it just me or has Mickey gotten progressively more funny, even charming? Like when he has an appointment to beat someone up while in the middle of talking to Fiona and Lip. You know now that I say it, it doesn’t sound funny at all, but that’s "Shameless" for you.

7. Sheila’s and Sammi’s dynamic continues to bring me joy.

8. Mad that Kev and Vee are on the rocks, but Svetlana and Kev’s bonding is precious.

9. Like I’m all on board for Mandy helping Mickey and Ian blackmail some anti-LGBT pastor, but I don’t have time for this Mandy/Lip b.s of will they or won't they?

10. Damn, Sean slamming Fiona cold with that she’s a chaos junkie bit. Women like her, really? C’mon man, the shipped has sailed on you. Bye. Will the next love interest for Fiona stand up, please?

11. I’m so glad we have some Debbie and Fiona bonding. I couldn’t stand not having that last season. That look though Fiona has when she realizes how she’s treating Debbie older than she is was chilling.

12. Sheila laying down the truth with Sammi. The girl is needy as hell. Sheila's words are so simple, but eloquent even when she's calling her trash.

13. Poor Debbie needs some good girlfriends! Svetlana’s a bit of a step up, but not her own age. I’m glad we’re done with those bitches though who were way too sexually active for their age.

14. I’m so happy that Ian, Svetlana, and Mickey are one big happy family. Ian needs help, though.

15. Oh my gosh, Gus is adorable. He is exactly what Fiona needs. Steve from "Once" is a keeper Fiona. Now you can hear “Falling Slowly” all you want on repeat girl.

16. Poor Mandy, man. She has no self-esteem cause of all these men who treat her like crap except for Lip. Their sex scene was heartbreaking cause clearly he’s not gonna stick around with her. Ugh, I hate this show for making me so conflicted with their relationship!

17. Debbie, nooooooooooooooooo. Ugh, this poor girl. What are you doing?! That was a beautiful between Fiona and Debbie though, but man this sucks.

18. Wait, is Sheila gone for good? I’m kind of okay with if that’s the last we see of her because what an exit. She’s going after the life she wants for herself and she doesn’t need anyone, especially not Frank, to make her happy. I love that so much.

19. Yay, I’m so happy Lip is with Amanda in Florida! They work so well together.

20. Seeing Fiona in love in a happy, healthy relationship is so sweet to watch.

21. Oh, hello very handsome love interest for Debbie. I see you. Please don’t mess this girl up. I swear.

22. Really? Fiona and Gus are such a good couple and they have to ruin it by getting married so soon? Man, now they don’t even have a chance. Steve isn’t even back yet, but of course, he is what will destroy their marriage. Great.

23. This season Debbie and Carl are just two little poor lost souls that I just want to protect from continuing to fuck up even more than they have already.

24. So, we got Sean, Gus, Angela, and now Steve? Is everyone just in love with Fiona now on this show?

25. God, I love Mickey this season with him being there for Ian and trying to help him. This is the Mickey I have been waiting for.

26. IAN. NO. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!?!

27. Hahahaha to Fiona punching Steve in the face. Well deserved. Emmy Rossum deserves all the awards just for that scene alone.

28. Okay, I’m warming back up to Sammi now that she’s not taking any of Frank’s shit and is actually taking care of all the kids.

29. Fiona. Nooooooooooooo. Stop being stupid with Steve. Ugh. Snooze.

30. Meanwhile, on the road trip to hell, my anxiety levels have reached a new all-time high with Ian and Yevgeny.

31. Oh my gosh. The devastating sex scenes this season are so hard to watch. When Fiona made Steve go was great, but hard to see her fall apart under such vulnerable circumstances.

32. If Lip was my RA, I would never leave my dorm.

33. Lip: You did good, Mickey.

Me: Cries forever.

34. Amy, Gemma, and Dominick are so cute. Oh, my goodness.

35. Lip trying to deal with his financial aid is too real a struggle for me right now. My gosh.

36. If I had a drink every time I said “Poor Ian” this season, I would have enough glasses to overflow my tears in.

37. I am so proud of Debbie for standing up for herself of how she would be a good girlfriend. Having that confidence so young is amazing. Good for her!

38. Really, Sammi? Now, you got to be full on crazy like that. C’mon.

39. Oh, my gosh, the scene with Mickey on the floor. Heartbreaking.

40. Wow, what a great last scene with Fiona and Steve. Amazing. Finally, Fiona is moving on. FINALLY.

41. Bye, bye Jimmy Steve Jack whatever your name is! Go brood away on your motorcycle.

42. THE CLIENT CANCELLED THE TRIP TO DUBAI. OF COURSE HE DID. MAN JACK CAN’T EVEN GO OUT WITH ANY CLASS. THE ACTUAL WORST.

43. Damn, Fiona and Vee both having those marriage issues. Girls, be there for each other! These guys are being dumb.

44. What kills me is that Vee could have cheated on Kev, but didn’t. And then Kev cheats on her hard with all these college girls. What is season five becoming except a sad pile of broken relationships?

45. Mickey, why you gotta let me down again? That’s right, you best come back and be there for Ian!

46. Debbie, man this girl is going through a lot. I feel so bad she feels bad for not seeing Ian get rid of all his pills.

47. Carl’s first sentencing lol

48. Why is Sammi the actual worst? She’s like the new Mickey. Funny how they hate each other so much.

49. Oh my gosh, really Lip? You need another love interest? Can’t Lip just have a happy relationship? Can anyone on this show? I’m just so over these added love interests with more plots for me to keep up with.

50. You know, maybe Carl does need juvie because he needs to stop acting like a little brat. I hate to say it, but he wants juvie like this kid needs to wise up real fast.

51. Is it weird I kind of love the relationship that’s building with Frank and this doctor?

52. What a nice scene with Sammi and Ian. I am shocked. I kind of would love this to be a thing.

53. Oh gosh, so much messy and complicated sex this season. I feel like almost every sex scene has felt so sad and wrong. Now Debbie and her new beau, and Mickey and Ian? I can’t take much more of this.

54. OH MY GOSH SAMMI YOU ARE THE ACTUAL WORST. I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS. POOR IAN. NO.

55. I would actually love Frank and Bianca to be together, but I have a feeling this is ain’t going to be "The Fault in Our Stars".

56. Kev and Veronica’s reconciliation is very them and fine, but Kev was still a major jerk. Also, we really have to wait basically the entire season for them to get back together? C’mon. This has been torture.

57. Ian and Monica’s scene is oddly touching. They’re so connected, yet they both need help and can’t help one another until they help themselves.

58. The scene with Fiona and Sean is nice and all, but they’re clearly going to be together. Can we just speed this up here?

59. Of course, Sammi isn’t dead. Of course not. No one on this show actually dies.

60. Oh my gosh, I’m so over this professor and her open marriage and weird sex life.

61. Of course, Kev doesn’t know how many people he slept with when he was a part from Vee cause he’s the absolute worst.

62. Lots of great acting on this season finale. Holy crap. That Debbie and Fiona scene, Kev and Vee, Ian and Monica. Many props, but so much sadness.

63. Okay, nevermind about no one dying. Poor Frank. Seriously.

64. Man, I feel for Amanda. Her and Lip were so good together! Now, I gotta deal with this professor more? Ugh. I’m already over it.


65. MICKEY AND IAN?NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. YOU CAN’T DO THIS TO ME. I JUST STARTED TO LIKE MICKEY THIS SEASON. I DON’T CARE IF IAN HAS A GOOD REASON. THEY NEED TO BE TOGETHER.

66. Thank goodness that scene came in with some humor in Sammi chasing after Mickey.

67. I would love this ending of everyone just kind of dealing with their own shit and going inside the house except that DEBBIE IS PREGNANT. And Carl is up to no good, and poor Frank is lamenting over Bianca and Lip and Ian just laugh at them because they have no idea what happened! Ugh, this season.