Whether it was your call or not, break-ups are difficult. Just because a break-up may be your decision, that doesn’t necessarily mean letting go of the person won’t be saddening. At the end of the day, you just need to let time do its thing so it can heal your wounds. But there are actions you can take to expedite that process. With a healthy combination of self-focus, distractions, and these six steps, odds are you’ll be over your ex sooner than you think.

1. Stop stalking on social media.

This is crucial. How are you supposed to get over someone if your consistently checking in on them, seeing who they may possibly be dating next, or sighing over last summer’s super sexy beach bod photos? And what if you accidentally like one of their post?! Save yourself that embarrassment and heartache. Allow yourself space from them, and overlook their new Snap story or Instagram post. Post-breakup is a time to be focusing on yourself.

2. Stop following on Facebook.

Facebook is a world of its own. There’s no need to delete your ex unless they’ve truly done you wrong. If doing so is something that must be done, that’s up to you. But if you want to avoid looking petty, consider simply unfollowing them. This will allow you peace of mind every time you log on to Facebook because you won’t fear a photo of them popping up the second you see your newsfeed.

3. Change their contact info.

They’re your ex. There’s no need to hold on to the heart emojis or pet names. Changing their name in your phone is a very simple, yet effective task. This helps you mentally. It allows you to feel in control for a moment regarding how you view this person.

4. Put yourself out there.

Whether it’s to date again or to simply refocus on yourself, put yourself out there! You’re entitled to one day (two max!!) of being a hermit. But after that, reconnect with the outside world. Have nights with just-friends to distract yourself from the pain and go on dates to remind yourself how wanted you are. Remember, the world has so much more to offer than you realize.

5. If you pick up the booze, put down the phone.

Listen, you want to blow off steam and hit the bars after a break-up. That’s understood. But please save yourself the drama by avoiding your phone when you're intoxicated. Drunk words may be sober thoughts, but drunk actions are what can get you in trouble. If it’s something that is truly worth sending, trust me—it’ll be worth sending post-hangover the next day.

6. Cry.

This step is tricky. It may come first or it may come last in the “getting over your ex” process. The point: Let it happen when it does. Crying can be therapeutic and relieving. It can allow you to release all the tension and anxieties that have been eating you up, and odds are you will feel better after you let all the feelings out. Once you cater to your emotional needs, you’ll be able to focus more on what is right for you when it comes to your ex.