Before we begin, I want to make it clear that I am no where near being labeled a gym rat. I go three to four times a week and mind my own business while listening to Drake on the elliptical. But there's some things I notice from time to time that catch my attention, and I know I'm not the only one.

Grunting.

If I had a quarter for every loud, obnoxious, unnecessary grunt I heard at the gym I'd be able to retire at the crisp age of 19. It's not hot; it's not cool, so please for the love of God stop with the gorilla-like noises. It's weider than you realize, and worst of all, I can hear it through my headphones (which is a real feat considering I have them on full blast at all times).

Please stop with the portable speakers.

I wish there was an invention where you can listen to your music in a way that didn't affect others. Maybe some cords ear buds would work. Yes, there have been those days where I've forgotten my headphones and, yes, it's rough. But please do not bring a boom box into the gym blasting your cousin's new mixtape. No one wants to hear it (unless it's Drake, then you're cool with me).

The one guy going turbo speed on the stepper (or anything for that matter).

I don't have the best technique, or the coolest workouts, but I know something's wrong, here. I don't think you should need a neck brace after 10 minutes on the step machine. I'm not sure what's happening, but it doesn't feel right.

Stop judging my Li'l weights.

Listen, I'm pretty short and not at all intimidating, and neither are my noodle arms. I see you eyeing my 30 pound weights. I, literally, see you.

Phone call on speaker.

I don't know why people want their business floating all up in the open at the gym, but so be it. I happen not to mind these, considering I have my headphones in most days, but when I don't I get so into the conversation, like I'm part of it. I hope no one saw me shake my head after I heard that this girl decided to cheat on her boyfriend -- these phone calls are always so juicy.

The gallon of water.

I get it, you want to stay hydrated, it's important. But watch where you put those things down. I almost lost my life tripping over a gallon of water last week. This stuff is serious!

Also, here's a visual of what it's like hopping over these things on my way down to the treadmill.