Growing up an "Army Brat", I genuinely thought I was prepared for jumping head-first into the life of being a Coast Guard spouse. I believed that, because I handled so much with my father being in the Army, I could take on the Coast Guard world without a problem.
I was SO wrong.
Not only is it practically the opposite of everything I anticipated it to be, but it's just as difficult as being a spouse of someone in any other branch of the military. Yes, they deploy. Yep, they go overseas, too. Here are a few pro-tips I've gathered from my brief two years as a faithful U.S. Coast Guard wife:
1. OPSEC, OPSEC, OPSEC.
I had no clue what it meant, even growing up in a military household. It actually means "operations security." Basically, it's the shortened version of "don't be an idiot." Don't post what day, time and location your spouse will be returning or departing on social media sites. Make sure family members don't do it, either. Just don't. Leave the element of surprise.
2. Actual Coast Guard bases with on-base housing are few and far between.
Living on the economy is FUN when you're stationed in Keokuk, Iowa and there aren't any affordable housing options within a 100 mile radius of your husband's boat.
3. You WILL encounter those wives that carry their husband's rank on their chests.
Stay far, far away from them. For whatever reason, they think they're better than you. And everyone else. They are the epitome of the term "dependapotamus" (Google it, you'll understand).
4. Other branches don't take you seriously, and it is ANNOYING.
You will get dirty looks for shopping in the commissary and The Exchange. You'll get sneers when you come through the gate and get your I.D. card checked. Believe it or not, folks, I have just as much of a right to be here as you do.
5. The Coast Guard is a small, tight-knit family.
There are so many awesome people that I've met because of my husband's career. Some I haven't even physically met in person! We look after each other (most of the time) and always keep in touch, no matter the distance or duty station; whether it be Watertown, New York, or Kings Bay, Georgia.
6. As a spouse, you need to learn to be independent.
Your other-half may be gone a lot more than you'd like, and you might end up in a place that's thousands of miles away from any family or friends. That's where your self-motivation needs to kick in. You have to learn to rely on yourself to get things done, because your spouse might not be home for another 6 months.
7. Being a spouse is VASTLY different than being a military child.
Really, it is. You're used to your mom or dad leaving for long periods of time. It's WAY more difficult when it's the love of your life. Although, I have to say, it's much easier to adjust to new areas and meet new people than it would be if I were to have no military experience at all.
8. Don't complain to other spouses about how long your hubby will be gone.
It's kind of inconsiderate. Someone out there always has it much worse than you! Your measly three-week deployment might look like a vacation to someone else's nine-month deployment. Make sure you're complaining to the right people if you DO decide to whine, though (It's okay to complain occasionally, because it really does suck sometimes).
Being a Coast Guard wife is something I take pride in. Although it can be extremely tough, I wouldn't trade a single second of it for the world. I love what my husband does for our country, and I love standing by his side the whole way through.
Semper Paratus!
