**Disclaimer: This article is intended for satirical purposes and does not in any way attempt to undermine the fact that being a workaholic can cause serious health problems in the long term.**
Work: you either love it or you hate it (most of us hate it, but that's okay.) Some of us are just better suited for it than others. College students especially understand the summer work grind, but being a "workaholic" isn't just a term reserved for teenagers trying to make money. True workaholics are practically married to their jobs and will be able to relate completely to these 6 points.
1. Whenever someone asks you where you are, the answer is always "at work." Always.
Those texts and calls to ask what you're up to with the prospect of some fun adventure to go on will always end up declined. You are always, always at work. At this point, you're not quite sure why they even bother to ask since they already know what the answer will be.
2. People who work less than you don't understand why they never see you around.
Some people just don't understand why you're so busy all the time. They with their looser schedules will, when they finally see you, act like you're a total stranger. Maybe it's a joke, or maybe they've genuinely forgotten what your face looks like, it's been so long.
3. Trying to make plans with other workaholics = a total disaster.
Does Monday work for you? No? Well, the rest of the week is jammed for me, and I don't have another day off for a week or so. What about next week? No, you're busy then? I guess we'll figure something out some other time.
4. Your nightlife is non-existent.
Once you're finally off work, all those tempting offers to go out with friends in the evening are all too often pushed aside in favor of a good night's sleep. Working this hard takes its toll, you know. Goodness knows how you'd function at work on a less than full night's sleep.
5. You're making bank.
This is one of the few pros to being a workaholic -- the paycheck. That moment when you're handed your check or the direct deposit hits and everything is worth it. Not that you'll have a bunch of time to be spending your hard earned cash, but that's beside the point.
6. When you're finally free, no one else is.
Somehow, when you miraculously have a speck of free time and want to spend it with someone else, everyone on the planet has other plans. You'll end up just laying around and watching Netflix (and it's good to relax, of course) but the tragic irony of the situation is never quite lost on you.
