College has brought on many moments of laughter, joy, excitement, and tears, all of the feels. But it has also brought me some extremely embarrassing moments, and for some reason, I now want to share them with the world. Judge me, laugh at me, or laugh with me, but maybe you can learn from some of my favorite embarrassing moments.
1. Pooping in the Rick's Bathroom
When you gotta go, you gotta go, and one of my lowest and most embarrassing moments was having to poop in the Rick's bathroom. Nothing about it was positive, there was a long line, and I took my time.
Some of the biggest takeaways from this was to not make your friend wait in the stall while you poop, as much as you want to blame them for the smell when you walk out. You should also warn your friends if you are going to do any bodily function other than pee, when you are sharing a stall in a public place.
I'm gross, I know.
2. Asking a guy with a girlfriend to my sorority formal.
So my senior year, I struggled hard to find a date to my last sorority date function. All of my go-tos were used up. My fallback friend of a friend had a bar crawl, so I had to dig deep to find a date. I decided that the guy in one of my group projects would be fun to go with, he's in a frat, and we always got along, so I decided to just take the plunge. I asked and he had to inform me that he had a girlfriend, and out of respect to her he couldn't' go. We had a group project meeting the next day.
What you can learn from this little mishap, is to do more Facebook creeping before asking a guy to formal. Also, if you act normal and don't bring things like this up at group project meetings, guys will pretend like it didn't happen too. (PS: This kid and I are still friends, yay!).
3. The time I cried over a boy at his frat house.
My sophomore year I had a little bit of a wild side, and had a huge crush on a guy, in a frat that I hung out at a lot. He wouldn't take me to his date party because he had a sort of girlfriend, (obviously I was delusional about where that was going to go). So, I decided that crying my eyes out was the best solution at the time. I cried, and when I say cried, I balled my eyes out over a boy who wasn't and was never going to be truly interested. Thank you to his brothers, who were also my friends, who comforted me and my sisters who escorted me home, and put me to bed where I rightfully belonged. The best advice I can give is that the best place to cry over a boy is nowhere, because crying over boys isn't worth it to begin with, but if you're going to cry over him, the worst place to do it is his frat house.
4. The time I called my professor Dad during office hours
I never go to office hours, I don't know what kind of questions to ask and I normally just email profs, or guess, if I have an issue (not the best way to go about things but hey, I'm graduating so it worked out). But one time in my college career I decided that I really needed to go sit down with my prof and get some additional explanations. I went in, got my help and as I was leaving I go, “Thanks Dad!". I don't know why I called my professor dad, but it was weird. He looked at me very strangely as I quickly scurried out. This encounter won't teach you much. I didn't go talk to my professor face to face again because I'm a wimp. Word to the wise, don't let this happen to you. Also, go to office hours if you need help, it's a great way to make connections.
5. The time I peed my pants on my drive down to Florida for Spring Break.
Freshman year, a group of friends and I planned a trip to Panama City Beach in Florida. (This was one of the best/worst decisions). We were driving down with guys who insisted that us girls couldn't drive at all because they were “better drivers", whatever, they suck. But because of this, my friend and I decided to drink (this is extremely illegal and should never be done, but it is a necessary point to get to the story). We drank a little too much in the back seat, and I really had to pee…I told the guy who was driving it was an emergency, and he pulled off to a rest area where he proceeded to go to the wrong entrance. All of the guys said that the truck side was too “sketchy", and that we had to continue to the next exit. This was not one of those “I maybe have to pee moments" but one of the “OMG MY BLADDER IS BURSTING" times.
We continue don our merry way down the highway and as soon as we pulled of the next exit, and I got up to pee my bladder couldn't hold on anymore, and I peed my pants. I didn't tell anyone but I had peed all over my pants and the seat was now wet ,and smelled like pee. I quickly told everyone I wanted to wear pants because I was cold so I grabbed a new pair of pants out of my bag and went in and changed.I have since informed all the of the riders in that car of the incident. They all knew. Thank you for not making fun of me in that moment. From this experience, I l can say never drank in a car again, because it is illegal, and even though I wasn't driving, that was a bad (and serious moment). Your friends will know when you peed your pants, no matter how good you think you are at hiding it. And another good tip: always bring an extra pair of pants. You'll never know when you're going to need them.
The time I opened my laptop up in class to have it play “My Neck, My Back" at full volume.
My friends and I had decided to have an impromptu dance party one night, and then I went to bed. The next day I got up late and rushed to class. I opened my laptop, and the music was blasting. Because I'm technically challenged, it took me an exceptionally long time to figure out how to turn it off. While my professor and the class enjoyed a very school inappropriate song that I got down to the night before. A key takeaway here, is to learn how to turn music off quickly, if it starts to play on your laptop. Also, don't listen to inappropriate music before bed.
