September 28, 2001, the day history changed forever. On this day, the movie Zoolander graced theater screens for all to see. While this movie is billed as a comedy due to the fact that it is 89 straight minutes of high-jinx ridiculousness and sheer idiocy, underneath the humor, the movie imparts invaluable wisdom upon those who watch it. The first time I watched Zoolander was in August 2006, and now, almost ten years later, I can finally put into words the lessons this film has taught me.
1. Have confidence in yourself that doesn’t waver under any circumstances.
In the above clip, Derek Zoolander, the male model the film is named after, accepts what would be his fourth consecutive Male Model of the Year Award, despite the fact that he did not win. Although this may be slightly humiliating, it is important to focus on how he was so confident in his modeling ability that the thought of not winning never entered his head, not even for a second.
The lesson: Always believe in yourself, because that belief can take you far. Who knows, maybe one day we could all become four-time models of the year.
2. Be true to yourself and understand who you are.
After an abrupt retirement from the male modeling profession, Derek travels home to work with his brothers and father in the mines. Due to the vast differences between the two professions, Derek and the rest of his family have never seen eye to eye, to put it lightly. However, to Derek’s credit, he tries to fit in as a miner (even if it was only for a day). However, he knows he is not built to be a miner, saying: “I’m sorry my hair looks better all done up with gel and mousse than under a stupid hat with a light on it.”
The lesson: Everyone is different, and there’s always more than one right way to do things. Don’t let the fact that other people may not understand why you do whatever it is that you do stop you from doing something the way you want to.
3. Know when to swallow your pride and let go of a grudge.
Once Derek is aware that he is being hunted, he realizes that he must hide in the last place anyone would ever expect to find him: at his biggest rival Hansel’s place. However, before he’s granted permission to hide out, he is forced to explain why he had been harboring so much ill will towards Hansel. Long story short, the air is quickly cleared, Derek is able to hide, and two former rivals become best friends.
The lesson: Don’t burn bridges out of principle, you never know when you’ll need someone to be there for you.
4. Always save your work and have a backup of something that is really important.
Good news: Derek and Hansel manage to expose the plot to brainwash the Malaysian Prime Minister and have the evidence to prove it. The bad news: They took the phrase “the files are in the computer” literally and destroyed the computer to find the files inside of them.
The lesson: Even the best the laid plans can go awry, have a backup in place at all times.
5. Don’t ever partake in gasoline fights.
This one is definitely self-explanatory, but just for context: Derek is upset about not winning the Male Model of the Year Award, so his friends he lived with decide to cheer him up with Orange Mocha Frappuccinos and a gasoline fight, which ends exactly how one might picture a gasoline fight ending.
The lesson: So many to pick from, so I’ll let you draw your own conclusions. Just don’t do what these guys did.
6. There’s more to life than being really, really, really, ridiculously good looking.
After his stunning defeat, Zoolander comes to the realization that the modeling life is shallow and seeks to find a way to do something more meaningful. To his credit, he follows through on his conviction to help others by founding The Derek Zoolander Center for Kids Who Can’t Read Good and Want to Learn How to Do Other Stuff, Too.
The lesson: It’s always for the kids.
There are so many other lessons I could write, but I don’t want to spoil even more of the movie for those who haven’t seen it. If “those” in the previous sentence applies to you, go watch the movie. It will change your life.