When I was in high school I used to ask this question: How does a person know when they are in love? I wondered the same thing for myself when I first started to date. Was I in love with the person, or did I simply just have strong feelings for them?
After being in my first long term relationship, I have truly grown to realize what love is. Love is a beautiful thing. It is selfless, fearless and ineffable. Now I don't have to ask myself the question as to whether I am in love anymore, I just know. And I think you will know too if you can agree with these 5 ways. These are the top five ways I have realized of how you know when you are in love.
1. You stop looking
This doesn't mean that you completely stopped looking at other people because let's face it, occasionally we all take a look at attractive people naturally. What I mean is that you simply stop looking for someone else to be with. You see an attractive person but automatically shift your mind back to the person you're already with. When you stop looking it isn't because you are bored or not attracted to anyone. You stop looking because you can't imagine being with anyone else at the time because you are so committed to this person.
2. It's easy to see a future with them
If you see yourself taking this person home to family, go on a vacation or even if you start to plan little things in the future with them, these are all signs. If you can picture life with someone even in the near future, this is very important. This means they are more than just a fling or a temporary lover. In my mind, seeing a future means that values match up and that is a huge aspect of falling in love with someone.
3. You don't ask everyone's opinion all the time
If you are really in love with your significant other, what your friends say won't matter all the time. Of course, all of us want input from our family and friends. However, in the big scheme of things, if one of your friends dislikes something about your love, you're not going to back away from one negative opinion. When you love someone, you stand by their side. You trust your own opinion over everything. If that opinion is secure and sure enough, things are real.
4. You trust them
Trust is hard. It isn't something you might feel in love right away. I do believe that people can fall in love fast, but trust takes time. Trust isn't developed over a day or even a week. It's developed over time. Trust is knowing that you and your partner are both in the relationship for the same reasons. Trust is not having to worry about little things. Trust comes through challenges and celebrations in love. But once you eventually trust your partner, there is no doubt that you two have something special.
5. You don't let go when things get hard
Unlike the movies and books, we all have tough times in relationships. We all have times where we want to throw in the towel. When you are in love, there is no guarantee that things will be perfect. In fact, they probably we won't be. People are going to fight and disagree, but that doesn't mean that you give up on love. If the circumstances are dangerous, that is a different story. But if you love with passion and emotion, hard times will never pull you and your partner apart. If you are truly in love with someone, and they are in love with you, letting go isn't going to happen.
Over the past year of being in a long term, long distance relationship, I have found these things to be true. If you're truly in love, you won't question anything. You'll just know. Love is patient and kind, and it doesn't disappear if two people truly are all in.
