As a millennial I am constantly told that my generation is killing everything from restaurants to the diamond industry, vacations, McDonald's, malls, so on an so on. While most of what we are accused of killing, such as the hangout sitcom are luxuries or overly expensive or unrelatable to our struggling economy and and while you can call me self centered, I'd rather work and have a cushion for rent or donate to charities than buy a diamond that is intrinsically worthless, I will concede that we have made some major changes to dating scene.Here are just some ways in which we've changed the game of dating, marriage and hookups.
We've taken the game online
Growing up in an ever changing world, we have normalized online dating. While online dating might have been that quirky weird thing your mom's one divorced friend tried and got shamed for, we have succeeded in normalizing meeting people online and have taken the taboo and seemingly dangerous act of meeting people online and just made it the norm and have encouraged others to try it.
Screw the four day rule
My friend recently met up with someone eight years after her senior year and started ranting to me about the four day rule. Where you wait four days after hanging out with or seeing them before contacting them again. With our ever changing environment, we are constantly moving and adapting to everything that is thrown our way (which is a lot) and frankly if you wait four days we have probably already panicked over it and have started to move on and go on with our lives and talked to people who more reflect our fast paced life style.
We move faster, emulating lesbian stereotypes
Lesbians are infamously known for nesting and becoming very close and entering relationships rather rapidly and the those not within the community have adapted similar tendencies. We work a lot and throw ourselves into everything we do and we only have certain windows to meet or hang out with people, so we don't have time to do the standard we dates or three month rules that were shoved down our throats as children.
Hooking up or "hookup culture" is no big deal
Now I will concede that there are outliers and foils of each generation and their stereotypes, but most people have or know people who have partaken in a hookup and while some people have tendencies to attempt to shame their friends, most people just don't care. We don't have the time or capability to do the unnecessary waiting periods and if it feels good and everyone is on the same page and consenting, who cares? One night stands, friends with benefits and just casual hooking up is perfectly fine. Don't shame people for their choices and don't feed into double standards, let's be the generation to kill shaming.
Chivalry didn't die, it evolved
Chivalry is not dead. But we also don't need the one milkshake two straws and outdated standards and dates from forever before us. Being chivalrous now is supporting your partner and being someone they can trust and go to, without worrying about you belittling them. Not trying to change, fix or save those you interact with. If you want to open doors or every once and a blue moon get flowers that is perfectly fine, but we'd rather just know that you are real and genuine because we've all been dealing with people who are scared to be themselves for far too long.
While we have been blamed for luxuries dying and have succeeded in lowering the smoking rate, of tobacco at least, let's band together and end shaming. Hooking up or sexual orientations or weight or kinks is nothing to be ashamed of. While the game may have changed, it isn't dead. If something does not evolve or adapt it will die, that's just basic biology. Chivalry isn't dead, but if we've changed things, don't assume it ruins them. Just because you do not understand something does not mean that it is wrong or worse than what came before it. Maybe we are changing the game, but it isn't to spite those who came before us, it's just to help us thrive and survive. Different is not better or worse, it just is.
