According to College Board, the organization we all know and love from taking all of our wonderful AP classes in high school, the average college student pays anywhere between $9,000 and $31,000 a year for tuition and fees to attend a university. While a college education is most certainly worth paying an exorbitant amount of money and putting up with the daily struggle of deciding whether or not to go to class, one can't help but wonder what could I buy instead of paying for college. So I've compiled a short list of things that cost around the same amount of money as college.
1. An Island: $22,215
While this particular island may be in Nova Scotia, a bitterly cold area in Canada, it is still a literal island and costs less than a year of college at a private university, or even a state university if you're an out-of-state student. You could purchase an island and hole up by yourself, watching Canadian Netflix in your little log cabin instead of going to class and getting lectured about grammar usage in formal essays.
2. A Birkin Bag: approx. $10,000
Ah, the glorious Birkin bag. This wonderfully expensive monstrosity made by Hermès in honor of '60s icon Jane Birkin comes in leather and crocodile, with the leather starting around $10,000 and the crocodile starting at $60-to-70,000. They are hand made and come made to order, and there is typically a two-year waiting list to order one. They are the epitome of class and luxury, and they make me want to major in something that will make me a lot of money because Hermès is calling my name.
3. Seven Armani Suits: approx $28,000
The classiest of attire in the realm of menswear, the Armani suit is one of many things you can buy multiples of and still have a little money left over from what you saved for college. This particular one from Saks Fifth Avenue goes for approximately $4,000, so you could literally buy seven and still have enough money to spare to purchase a lesser Armani suit for a measly $3,000. Then you would have a suit for every day of the week and one left over for the days when you get the other ones dry cleaned.
4. A Rolex: $30,955
Another luxury staple, the Rolex watch is the timepiece of the person who needs to make sure they're back yachting in time for their tennis lessons in France. You too could appear to be that person, if you would just spend your college money on this accessory and be the fanciest person in the room.
5. (Approximately) 475 Pairs of Kendra Scott Earrings: $30,875
One of the key components of any sorority girl or female OU student's wardrobe, the classic Kendra Scott Danielle earrings run for approximately $65 each, meaning if you opt out of going to college and instead choose to spend all of that money on earrings, you can certainly afford to order every color in the Kendra Scott Color Bar and still have enough to practically buy the whole store.
6. A Kidney: $20,000
According to Popular Science, a kidney runs for about twenty-thousand U.S. dollars in India, so if you're ever down on your luck in the organ department and need a spare kidney, you can always just hop of a flight to New Delhi and conjure up a kidney for less than the cost of a year of college. (side note, you can also sell a kidney for the around ten-thousand dollars)(other side note, I am not condoning the sale of your organs.. just donate plasma like every other college student).
7. The tooth of a Tyrannosaurus Rex: $27,000
You can also purchase the tooth of a Tyrannosaurus Rex, the king of the dinosaurs, for the low, low price of twenty-seven thousand dollars not including shipping. This bad boy is for sale on eBay and you better act fast, it currently has fifty-one watchers just waiting to snag it.
8. Part of a Rolls Royce: $200,000
For the cost of a year of college at a private university you can purchase 15% of a Rolls Royce, the height of luxury in the vehicle world. You can drive 3/20ths of this wonderful car, or just use your grad school money too and buy the whole thing.
9. Three First Class Tickets to Paris: $35,685
While it's going to cost you a little more than a year's worth of college, you can still fly out to Paris, the city of love, light, and the place that currently has my heart, 3 times, one way each, departing from Dallas Fort Worth airport. Personally, I considered taking my college money and moving to Paris long ago, and fully support anyone making that decision. It's a magical place and I'm sure the second you arrive at CDG in that breathtaking city you'll fall in love with it the same way I did.
10. Two Sharks: $26,000
That's right, for less than the cost of one year of college, you can purchase TWO WHOLE SHARKS. Every week would be shark week for you if only you would just drop out of college and instead purchase yourself a pair of sharks (you would need two, of course, so that they wouldn't get lonely). For an additional cost I'm sure you could also attach frikkin lasers to their frikkin heads and you would have some laser sharks much like in the classic film, Austin Powers.
While there are many things one can purchase with the money allotted for a college education, the things listed above and pretty much anything else your heart desires, the value of going to college is so much higher than almost anything else you could buy for the same price, and in my (probably) biased opinion, I wouldn't want to spend my money on anything else.
