Ahh, college spring break. There really is nothing like it. I could waste sentence upon sentence trying to explain the unique insanity that is the first three weeks of March in the college world, but we all know what usually happens in the dirty south around this time of the year. Before you get too wild on the shores of the south, take time to remember a few important things, you crazy kids.
1. What happens on spring break does not stay on spring break.
I know you will hear this at least 100 times this week before trying many different strikingly stupid shenanigans, but I am above the influence and you probably will not be when you are being told this. I am here to remind you, you are being lied to. What happens on spring break absolutely does not stay on spring break. I promise you, your sorority sisters, the guy that sits next to you in your bio lab, and that weird kid you pass on campus every day (whose name you still have not learned) will all remember seeing you do that incredibly idiotic thing...even if you do not. So don't give in, because, I know its a far fetched thought at the time, but remember in seven short days, you will return to the same campus with those people.
2. Social media never goes away.
Speaking of never forgetting, one thing that never forgets or forgives is the internet. Once it's posted it is permanent, whether you realize it or not. You may delete that less than flattering picture of you crowd surfing in a skimpy bikini the next day, but it will be there forever. Not to mention every arch nemesis you have has probably already screen shot it and sent it in their group chat, and that is the least of your worries! Future employers are less than impressed by the video of you bonging a beer from a balcony. The same goes for your grandparents, the mom of the kid you babysit, and your boss. Keep it safe, keep it classy. You will be thankful you did.
3. Boys carry way worse things than cooties.
Okay, they still carry cooties, but they are like super, mega, ultra cooties that never go away. Interpret that as you will. Please tell me you're smellin' what I'm steppin' in so I don't have to continue this awkward fourth grade sex ed. talk. Respect yourself, respect your body. You will be happy you did in seven days, seven weeks and seven years down the road.
4. Drugs and Alcohol are not a game.
To keep going with the respect your body talk, please remember you only have one. Let loose and do you, but remember the things you are using for temporary fun, can cause permanent damage. No spring break is worth harming yourself for, and the only thing worse than hurting yourself on spring break, is not coming back. Be careful what water you dabble your feet in because sooner than you think you could be drowning in it. The only person that can truly look out for your best interests is yourself. YOU know your limits, YOU know what is safe and how much is too much. Respect those limits and forget the people who try to make you push them.
5. Some people are just bad people.
It does not take a rocket scientist to realize that the first three weeks of March bring the mother load of beautiful young girls to the beaches. Everyone knows this, even predators. Always be aware of your surroundings and trust your gut instinct. If something feels off...remember you are surrounded by thousands of (usually under the influence) strangers, so you are probably correct. Literally do not go anywhere alone. Not the taxi, not the beach, not the store, not even the bathroom. Always have a buddy.
You should have fun on your spring break, but always be ready to help yourself or someone else if a situation gets out of hand. Type important info such as a hospital address or your parents phone numbers in a note on your phone and make it your phone wallpaper. Anything can happen on the southern shores around this time of year. It is best to be prepared. College spring break will not be the highlight of your life (if it is you need to reconsider some things), you are more valuable than a trip to the beach. So have fun, be cautious, and use your sunscreen, kids!
