5 Signs Your Relationship Is Complicated

5 Signs Your Relationship Is Complicated

The wild world of dating.
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When I was in middle school, people constantly made their relationship status on Facebook “It’s complicated." I didn’t know if people were joking or trying to hint at someone they had a crush on. All I know is that, now, I’m in college and I feel like not much has changed. Life is complicated— people are breaking up, hooking up and making up. It is a wild world out there and if any of these things remind you of your dating life, you’re not alone.

1. Your feelings towards your loved one are always changing

One week you can’t get enough of them; you want to see them every day and everything is sunshine and rainbows. However, the next week everything they do or say pisses you off and start ignoring their texts and talking crap about them to your friends. Your relationship is so on/off that you’re just going with the flow and you don't really know what’s going on half of the time.

2. Your friends either love your significant other or hate them

This goes along with number one. Things are obviously a little complex between you two and your friends only see your side of the relationship, however, your friends' opinion of your significant other all depends on the timing of your latest gossip and coffee sesh with your BFF. Your friend might have caught you guys on a good week and you seem totally happy; therefore, they love them. If it just so happens they hear about this new love interest on an off night where your new SO is being a total a**hole, your friend will probably sh*t talk them forever. Note: the situation is all the more confusing if your squad hasn’t even met said SO in-person.

3. You both like each other but your lives get in the way

You both have complicated schedules. Maybe you’re both in school or you’re trying to focus on yourself while they're trying to focus on their self. You like each other and you have fun when you’re together, but when you’re apart you wonder where all of it is going. Sometimes it is hard to make time for each other. Whether you are both going through life transitions or you live in different cities — everything equals an “it’s complicated” status.

4. Your conversations about the relationship or feelings are something out of a TV Drama

You might feel like your arguments or discussions about the relationship are straight out of "Twilight." Whether it’s “don’t fall for me” or “we’re not good for each other” the theatrics are always to the max.

5. The inevitable question, “is this even a relationship?" constantly emerges

There’s so much going on in college; you’re trying to find yourself, make good grades, not go totally insane with stress, make new friends and learn to be on your own. It’s hard to make something work when everything in your life is changing all at once. With that being said, focus on what makes you happy and try not to worry.

Cover Image Credit: Signs By Deb O

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Why Girls Love The Dad Bod

If your man can rock the dad bod, he's a keeper.

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In case you haven't noticed lately, girls are all about that dad bod.

Girls have been dealing with body image issues since the beginning of time until recent (for those of you who consider yourselves to be "Thick thin") I hadn't heard about this body type until my roommate mentioned it. She used to be crazy over guys she claimed had the dad bod.

After observing the guys she found attractive, I came to understand this body type well and was able to identify it. The dad bod is a nice balance between a beer gut and working out. The dad bod says, "I go to the gym occasionally, but I also drink heavily on the weekends and enjoy eating eight slices of pizza at a time." It's not an overweight guy, but it isn't one with washboard abs, either.

The dad bod is a new trend and fraternity boys everywhere seem to be rejoicing. Turns out skipping the gym for a few brews last Thursday after class turned out to be in their favor. While we all love a sculpted guy, there is just something about the dad bod that makes boys seem more human, natural, and attractive. Here are a few reasons that girls are crazy about the dad bod.

It doesn't intimidate us.
Few things are worse than taking a picture in a bathing suit, one being taking a picture in a bathing suit with a guy who is crazy fit. We don't want a guy that makes us feel insecure about our body. We are insecure enough as it is. We don't need a perfectly sculpted guy standing next to us to make us feel worse.

SEE ALSO: Slim Thick Is The New Thin

We like being the pretty one.
We love people saying "they look cute together." But we still like being the center of attention. We want to look skinny and the bigger the guy, the smaller we feel and the better we look next to you in a picture.

Better cuddling.
No one wants to cuddle with a rock. Or Edward Cullen. The end.

Good eats.
The dad bod says he doesn't meal prep every Sunday night so if you want to go to Taco Tuesday or $4 pitcher Wednesday, he'd be totally down. He's not scared of a cheat meal because he eats just about anything and everything.

You know what you're getting.
Girls tend to picture their future together with their guys early on. Therefore, if he already has the dad bod going on, we can get used to it before we date him, marry him, have three kids. We know what we are getting into when he's got the same exact body type at the age of 22 that he's going to have at 45.


So there you go. A simple break down of why girls everywhere are going nuts over this body type on males. We like it. We love it. We want some more of it. So here's to you dad bods, keep it up. Men, confidently strut that gut on the beach because while you stare at us in our bikinis we will be staring just as hard.

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My Boyfriend Made Me Feel Loved When I Found It Hard To Love Myself

I realized someone can still love me despite my mental illness.

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I was diagnosed with my first mental illness when I was 20. I saw my doctor, started taking meds, and briefly did some therapy before returning to college for my junior year. I met my now-boyfriend the first weekend back, and we instantly clicked. things were so easy. They just felt right.

The only problem was that I was terrified to tell him that I was struggling; that I was setting up appointments at the counseling center and with a psychiatrist. My friends at the time tried to talk me into keeping my anxiety a secret, that it would be too much baggage and that he'd want to leave when he found out I wasn't "perfect."

I decided to tell him anyway. He was so completely understanding it took my breath away. He walked me to my first counseling appointment, holding my hand and introducing himself to my therapist. I couldn't believe that I had this amazing guy who not only wanted to be with me, but also was so supportive of my struggles. I felt really lucky.

Things were not always easy, especially in the beginning when I really didn't have the words to speak about how I was feeling. There were many nights where I just cried, and he sat with me, so patient, even though he didn't really understand what I was going through. There have been times that we've gotten frustrated with each other because he can't help me if he "doesn't know what's going on." And yet, he never once left or made me feel more alone.

I think our communication has improved tenfold since I've been in therapy and treatment. We've both come to realize that he doesn't have to totally understand what's going on to be supportive, and I've come to recognize that he's my person, and telling him what I feel and what I need isn't a burden.

Through my most recent relapse this past winter, I really saw just how challenging and straining mental illness can be on a relationship. I was so scared to tell anyone besides my treatment team that I was struggling, so I kept things a secret from my boyfriend. He obviously was more intuitive than that, though, and knew I was having a hard time again with food. He'd call or text me throughout the day, asking if I'd had breakfast, what I had for lunch, how my day was going. This kind of gentle support made the biggest difference, where I felt like I wasn't alone, and I knew I had someone to keep me accountable to my recovery.

There are still the hard days. I think the most challenging part of dating with a mental illness is realizing that someone else can love you deeply, even if you're having a tough time loving yourself. This extends through my eating disorder, which constantly tells me I'm not good enough for anyone and that my body is not attractive to anyone, especially my partner.

Nick has been the best partner in crime through my recovery, assuring me that my eating disorder is lying to me and that he can love me enough for both of us, while I'm working on getting there myself. I know that my mental illnesses aren't the easiest to deal with, but I think we've become a stronger team because of everything we've conquered--together.

Three years later, I'm happily in love with this wonderful human, and in the best place mentally that I've ever been in. I don't think that's a coincidence, and for all of the support always, I am beyond thankful.

Cover Image Credit:

Photo credit: Charlotte Kurz

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