Throughout my life, I have always found myself putting others above myself, whether I was willing to wake up in the middle of the night to pick a friend up at work or put aside plans I had already made to take a shift for someone at work. I would say the ability to care for others is an amazing quality to have, but at some point or another, you need to choose yourself. I once heard a quote that said: "If I asked you to name everything you love, how long would it take for you to name yourself?" It is okay to love yourself more than anyone else, in fact, you should love yourself more. I am choosing to put myself at the top of the list. I know plenty of caring people in my life who need help with understanding that it is okay to put yourself first, and that it doesn't make you a terrible person at all, it only makes you human. Here are five reasons why I choose me, and you should choose yourself.
1. Less stress.
Taking care of everyone else is an extremely stressful process. After spending all day every day making sure everyone else is okay, you need to make sure you are too. It is really nice that you want to help everyone, but you can't save the world. Take a few moments or even days, to let yourself relax and breathe on your own for some time.
2. Freedom.
There is a certain freedom in doing what you want with your spare time. Once you stop going out of your way for people who won't go out of their way for you, it feels like you have all the time in the world. As cliche as it sounds, you now have time to find yourself. Once you stop letting others define you, you'll start to find what actually does define you. Take this new found freedom to try new things that you have always wanted to try and things that may seem out of your comfort zone!
3. Clarity.
Once you stop making others a priority, you learn who values your friendship. Some people are just your friend for convenience, others because they need you, and if they don't go out of their way to make themselves a presence in your life then they don't deserve your friendship. Real friends will call to check on you when you go awol, they notice when you are missing and they will let you know when they do. This new found clarity may be hard to face, but you don't need toxic people in your life who don't show they care about you.
4. Courage.
It takes a lot of courage to do things on your own when you aren't used to it, you may not usually eat alone but, if they don't value what you bring to the table then they don't deserve to eat with you. You don't need anyone for anything, you are a strong, independent person who doesn't need to rely on anyone. You just have to remember that this experience will make you a better person, and in the end, you will be stronger for doing things on your own. It takes a lot of courage and strength to put yourself first but, in the end, it is important you learn how to take care of yourself too.
5. Opportunity.
Once you decide to take care of yourself, new opportunities will fall into place like fate, you may get a new job or even have time to learn how to play the ukulele like you've always wanted! You may even have the opportunity to make new friends, meet new people and learn more. Don't take this time for granted, make sure you challenge yourself at every new chance you get. This time apart is about finding yourself, so don't miss your shot to do just that.