tMaybe it is because the idea of a nuclear family was so prevalent in American society for such a long time that lots of people will instantly feel bad for you if you tell them your parents are divorced. While it is true that divorce can negatively effect a child's life in some ways you also learn a lot through this process. It is different in every individual case. I was very young when my parents divorced so it was much easier since I can't even fathom my parents as a married couple, but there are definitely some positive lessons you learn from this experience!
1. It's Okay to Break Up
It's okay if your relationships fails. It doesn't say anything about you or your partner. Sometimes, things don't work out. Even if you broke up because of something worse, like infidelity, it will be okay eventually. I'm sure my parents went through a lot of pain when they first divorced, but they are both living happy lives at the moment so it didn't ruin their entire lives. A break up is not the end of the world, even if it can feel like it at times.
2. Rationality
You learn to be a bit more rational about relationships younger than most people. Usually, teenagers enter into their first relationship with ideas, that are beautiful in theory, but terrible in practical situations. Yes, it would be wonderful if this relationship was forever and everything was sunshine and candy for the rest of your lives, but that is not going to happen. You've already figured that life lesson out by watching your parents. Relationships are often just as painful as they are fulfilling and the best way to succeed in one is clear communication.
3. Independence
You learn that you need to be able to support yourself and to be able to take care of yourself in any situation. Luckily, both of my parents had jobs and could live on their own, but there are a lot of cases in which mainly women ended up without the means to support themselves after a divorce.
4. Creativity
I say creativity just so I don't have to say manipulation, but you do learn how to play your parents against each other when you want something. Most of the time when I did this it wasn't malicious. I just knew which parent to go to for what issue or for what toy I wanted. I like to think that children of divorce would make good lawyers because we have been negotiating between parents for years.
5.Dating/Learning from Mistakes
It is both incredibly funny and painful to watch your parents date. It is also creepy when you start to learn both your parent's pattern in dating and their "type." You can learn a lot about what to do while dating, but most of the time you learn what not to do while dating. We also usually share some habits when it comes to dating with at least one parent so you can learn from their mistakes.
