It's funny how the use two simple words can affect one so deeply. I used to hate it when people would refer to me as a "good girl." It got to the point that it almost felt like an insult. Silly right???..or is it? The term alone carries so much weight and when people start calling you a good girl their expectations can weight heavy on you. For me it was more than just their expectations though. There are certain assumptions that automatically go along with being a good girl.
The term "good girl" is intended to be positive and those who say it generally mean well, but the innuendo attached to it is not always of good nature. Of course, I hate to generalize and not every good girl has the same experiences but for me there were just a few things that stood out in my mind when I heard the term. Here are 5 things only a good girl would understand.
1. "You're So Boring."
This one is common. Being a good girl really doesn't make you boring. I remember when I was in school I used to hear this all of the time. It is possible that I truly was just boring, but it seems that the words boring and good are almost used interchangeably. People tend to generalize good girls with this remark mostly because we don't smoke, drink or party all night. When I was young I was pretty much on lock down. Most of my nights were either spent in church or studying. My friends could never understand why I didn't just sneak out to be with them. A common misinterpretation is that, as a good girl you do as you're told because you're a suck up or a people-pleaser, which isn't always the case. For me, most of the time I just did what I was told to do because, what I was told to do just felt right.
2. "You Never go anywhere."
There were so many events I never went to and parties I missed out on, somewhat making me the butt of many jokes. They used to tease me (in their mimicking voices), "Sonya has to ask mommy first?" There were so many reasons why I didn't go out very often. The main one, for this good girl, was that I had extremely overbearing and involved parents that wanted to know where I was every waking minute. It was just easier to not show up than to go and have to answer to the one million questions my parents had for me before I stepped foot of the door. Aside from that, at the end of the day I would choose the comfort of my own home over the party scene any day due to the fact that I really was never into that lifestyle.
3. Club Life Just Isn't for you.
Don't get me wrong, I love dancing!!... I just don't love clubbing. More specifically I don't like the atmosphere that goes along with clubbing. To be clear I have never been to a "real" club. I remember going to a teen club one time at the age of 16, and then when I turned about 22, my friends were finally able to convince me to go out, a little bit more, to bars. My analysis of clubs is very limited but being that clubs and bars are pretty much the same I know what to expect with the atmosphere. When I go out to dance, I just want to spend time with my girls and have a little warranted, clean fun. However, as soon as you arrive at a club you almost immediately run into some sweaty, drunk guy that hovers all over you just to get your number. I can almost guarantee you that he has one intention and we all know what that is. He is just looking for a one night stand and that has never been me.
4. "You're such a prude."
In high school I was such a prude ...or so I was told. I remained pure all throughout high school, which is not all too common. That being said, when the topic of sex would come up, it left me feeling kind of on the outs. All my friends would talk about their sexual activities and I would just sit there, feeling completely left out. You're either doing it or you're lame. If you're not having sex you are one of the few, and more than likely you are being overlooked by the opposite sex.
5. He's Just Not That Into You...
Typically guys find themselves attracted to someone who's willing to give more than the average good girl. They love a challenge but it's not until boys become men that they realize how much they genuinely appreciate the "good girl" they can bring home to mom, which left us good girls feeling not so good after all.
